Dear daughters,
I know our trip to the cemetery last Tuesday wasn’t exactly what you had in mind. You were hungry (a quick stop at Tim Horton’s would have been ideal, my apologies for that). You were also frustrated about missing some classes at school and annoyed by the wait to see Susan B. Anthony’s grave.
Regardless, I truly appreciate you joining me that morning. I realize the significance of voting might not resonate with you yet — and honestly, it can be hard for me to grasp sometimes too. Even while I am aware that voting is a privilege not shared by everyone around the globe, I occasionally forget its value. Thus, I understand why visiting a gravestone might not have been at the top of your list.
However, I believe that as you mature, the experience will take on a deeper meaning.
As you grow older, travel, and encounter diverse individuals, you’ll live out the lessons you learned in school. You’ll witness the unfair treatment of people of color, and given your biracial identity, you may even face it firsthand. You’ll see the injustices faced by the LGBTQ community and how differently-abled individuals are often ridiculed. The inequities in our world will astound you and break your hearts.
At your age, it’s impossible to fully comprehend these issues, which is why your dad and I strive to provide you with some perspective. From volunteering at shelters to participating in Pride parades, we make a concerted effort to discuss race and equality whenever possible.
I lacked this understanding until much later in life, and my hope is to give you an earlier start. You might look back on these experiences and groan in annoyance (let’s be real, this is definitely going to happen). But I hope you’ll also reflect on them with some understanding of why they meant so much to me and what I aimed to achieve.
So, why did I bring you along to vote and then wait in line to honor Susan B. Anthony on election day? You may have complained, but I felt it was essential. I have no doubt that you will face challenges and obstacles simply because you are women. Every woman I know has faced harassment or been underestimated due to their gender.
When those moments arise, I want you to recall experiences like our visit on Tuesday. I want you to remember how you asked if you could wear a pantsuit in honor of Hillary Clinton, excited to wear the blazers I found at a thrift store. I want you to recall how eager you were to get out of bed, thrilled at the prospect of a woman possibly becoming president.
Think back to the smiles exchanged with other women in their pantsuits at the polling place, a reminder that we are part of an unspoken sisterhood. I want you to remember the woman who ran past us in the long line, joyfully calling out “High fives, everyone!” and how we all laughed and raised our hands. The beautiful autumn day, the vibrant red leaves, and the electrifying atmosphere — those moments are imprinted in my mind. (You’ll probably also remember the name Mary Smyles Butts on one of the tombstones; it gave us all a chuckle.)
I want you to reflect on how we allowed a woman with a walker to bypass us, even after waiting in line ourselves, because her companion asked for our kindness. That’s what women do for each other — we lift one another up, support, and cheer. I want you to remember the woman ahead of us who stood for over an hour holding a bouquet of white flowers, only to give away most of them to those around her, including you and me.
I want you to remember how we almost skipped down the cobblestone path, whispering, “Do you really think she can do it?” Remember, we didn’t support Secretary Clinton solely because she is a woman; we had many reasons. But the fact that a woman could reach this point is thrilling. We owe so much to trailblazers like Susan B. Anthony, who fought for our right to have a voice.
The primary reason I brought you to the cemetery was to honor those women who paved the way for you. I want you to understand our shared history in hopes that it will give you a clearer vision for the future.
Ultimately, I wanted you to believe — not just in the possibility of a Hillary Clinton presidency, but in yourselves as empowered women. I want you to remember that whenever you doubt yourself because of your gender, when someone tells you that you can’t do something due to your chromosomes, or when you encounter disrespect, you’ll remember that long line of people, sharing high-fives, flowers, and kindness, honoring a woman who sacrificed so much for our right to speak out. You’ll remember our connection to the broader world.
Even though Hillary Clinton didn’t win the presidency, the fact that she made it this far is remarkable. If a woman can come this close to the highest office in our country, then you, my dear daughters, can achieve anything you set your hearts on. That is worth celebrating and waiting in line for, regardless of the election outcome.
Yes, I’m devastated by the election results and worried for our country, but I also recognize that women are strong, brave, and supportive of one another. Susan and Hillary didn’t give up, and neither will we. If not this year, then another. We will continue to fight together for progress.
I brought you to the cemetery to instill the belief that one woman can change the world. Her name is Susan. Her name is Hillary. And her name is yours as well.
With love,
Mom
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Summary:
A mother reflects on taking her daughters to Susan B. Anthony’s grave to instill the importance of women’s rights and the historical struggle for equality. Despite their initial reluctance, she emphasizes the significance of understanding their past to empower their future as women. Through shared experiences and lessons, she aims to foster confidence in her daughters, inspiring them to overcome challenges and honor the legacy of women who fought for their rights.