When my partner and I first tied the knot, our nights were filled with fervor and excitement. I often reminisce about those delightful moments. We took our time, indulging in each other’s company, relishing every second. If one encounter left us wanting more, we eagerly returned for another round, exploring new locations—on the kitchen counter, the couch, the bed, and sometimes even outside on the patio.
But everything shifted once we welcomed our little ones into the world, and mealtime transformed drastically.
Before entering the realm of parenthood, countless individuals offer warnings about the challenges ahead. However, one crucial detail is often overlooked: you probably won’t enjoy a hot meal for at least a decade. If you’re fortunate enough to have just one child, you might squeeze by with six years, but that’s a stretch.
No matter how much effort you put into preparing a gourmet dinner or whether you opt for a quick microwave dish of chicken nuggets and macaroni, you’ll find that your meal will turn cold and unappetizing by the time you finally sit down to eat.
First, you must serve everyone else’s plates. With multiple kids, this task can take an eternity. Toddlers, in particular, come with their own set of demands. They need a specific plate and utensils (“No, no! The blue plate!”), and their drink choices lead to debates (“I want juice. No, milk! In the dinosaur cup!”).
If your children are picky eaters, you’ll spend additional minutes removing any “yucky” bits of food—like onions or carrots—or at least hiding them. As a caring parent, you’ll also ensure everything is cut into small, safe pieces. If meat is involved, you might even obsess over uniformity in size (not that I’m guilty of this or anything, ahem).
Then comes the comedic irony: as you prepare to eat, you’ll find that everything is “too hot.”
Just as you finally sit down with your fork raised, someone will inevitably spill their drink. A mere four ounces of juice will somehow morph into a 12-ounce puddle, requiring you to use an entire roll of paper towels to clean it up. In the chaos, you’ll also realize you forgot to distribute napkins—essential for this messy endeavor.
Someone will drop their spoon and demand a new one because the dog licked it. But of course, there are no clean spoons in sight, so you’ll have to wash one or at least rinse off the dog slobber. Or perhaps just wipe it on your shirt—no judgment here.
Then there’s the inevitable request for salt and pepper, followed by complaints that there’s too much. A child will remind you that you forgot the gummy vitamins, while another finishes their meal amidst all this madness, immediately asking for more. You’ll find yourself back at square one with serving, cutting, and blowing on food to cool it down.
Dining out may slightly improve your chances of enjoying a hot meal, but you’ll still face the same cutting and cooling challenges. Plus, you’re shelling out six bucks for a kids’ meal that results in two French fries and a half-eaten corn dog.
Someday, your children will grow older, and you might get to relish a leisurely dinner again—at least until sports practices and social engagements take over, and you’re left gobbling down food without tasting it.
I mean, the prospect of a relaxed dinner is as likely as winning the lottery or spontaneously combusting.
For now, my best advice? Invest in a quality microwave. It’s a lifesaver for parents! Consider adding it to your baby registry. If you’re interested in exploring more about home insemination, check out this post. Moreover, if you’re looking for creative ideas, Crafty Celebrations offers fantastic DIY projects. For additional insights on pregnancy, visit this excellent resource.
In summary, life with kids means redefining mealtime. From the chaos of serving and cleaning to the inevitable spills and demands, the joy of a hot meal feels like a distant memory. But hang in there—one day, you’ll reclaim those peaceful evenings, or at least find a way to survive the madness.