As my son, Leo, stepped into preschool this year, my refrigerator transformed into an exhibition of his art projects while I eagerly listened to stories about his daily adventures. Recently, I received my first notice about photo day at school, prompting me to reflect on how quickly time flies.
My initial reaction was a mix of nostalgia and surprise at how grown-up Leo seemed. Then came the inevitable questions: What outfit should he wear? How should I style his hair? But as those thoughts crossed my mind, I remembered an important lesson I strive to impart to my children: Be yourself, always. Regardless of external opinions, I want them to embrace their true selves.
Many parents share this aspiration, hoping their children will remain authentic rather than conforming to societal expectations. So, why was I contemplating how to make Leo look perfect for his photo day?
Even before he grasped the concept of picture day, I found myself meticulously planning his outfit, ensuring he had a crumb-free breakfast to avoid accidental stains. I envisioned him looking pristine and perfectly styled for this significant milestone, adhering to societal norms that dictate how children should present themselves in photographs. After all, these pictures will be shared with teachers, friends, and family for years to come.
However, I realized that adhering to these expectations conflicted with my desire for Leo to be true to himself. Consequently, I’ve decided that he will have the freedom to choose his own outfit for photo day. Whether it’s a mismatched ensemble of stripes and polka dots or a fun headband, that’s entirely his choice. If his hair carries the windswept look from playtime, or if he sports a bruise from wrestling with his sister, so be it. That’s just part of being four.
I’m not concerned if Leo doesn’t look picture-perfect in his school photos. I want those images to capture his essence—the boy with slightly tousled hair, making his own fashion decisions, who plays hard and loves even harder.
There’s no need for him to appear immaculate in his school portraits; after all, four-year-olds simply aren’t immaculate. My goal is for my children to grow up indifferent to others’ opinions about their appearance, and this mindset should extend to every day, not just photo day. The true beauty of these pictures lies in the memories we create, allowing us to look back years from now and see a child who radiated joy from within, regardless of how well his outfit matched.
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In summary, I’m embracing authenticity over perfection for my kids, especially on picture day. Their true selves, with all their quirks and unique styles, are what I want to cherish in our family memories.