As a child, I often felt different. I was labeled as “shy,” but I was not quite an introvert. I enjoyed socializing, yet I’d feel mentally and emotionally drained after a few hours of interaction. I longed to have a thicker skin, to be one of those resilient individuals who could easily tune out the overwhelming sights, sounds, and sensations around them.
It wasn’t until recently that I discovered the term “Highly Sensitive Person” (HSP), introduced by psychologist Elaine Aron. As an HSP, I embody many characteristics associated with this trait, which affects about 15 to 20% of the population. Understanding this aspect of myself has been liberating; I no longer resist my sensitivity but embrace it, reshaping my life to align better with who I am.
When I first became a mother, I was unaware of my sensitivity. The experience of new motherhood felt particularly intense, overwhelming my senses. As time has passed, I’ve realized that I will never be the type of mom who can handle daily excursions with my kids or block out the constant noise that comes with parenting. Here are some struggles that resonate with many highly sensitive moms:
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Playdates Can Be Draining
Planning and hosting playdates can be a whirlwind for us. It’s not just about the mess or the potential for minor accidents; it’s the mental gymnastics of managing adult conversations while keeping an eye on the kids. We cherish these moments but often prefer them to be brief and not too frequent. -
Moms’ Nights Out Might Be a No-Go
While I value my friendships with fellow moms, I often opt for one-on-one gatherings instead of group outings. After a long day caring for my children, the thought of heading out to socialize can feel daunting. Instead, I find solace in a quiet evening at home with some Netflix and a glass of wine. -
We Absorb Emotions Deeply
I often sense when someone is upset, even if they’re trying to hide it. This heightened empathy extends to my children, making it challenging to not internalize their emotions. As they navigate their own feelings, I can feel drained and touched out, a common experience for sensitive moms. -
The News Hits Hard
Since becoming a mom, I find myself deeply affected by distressing news stories, particularly those involving children. Imagining my own kids in those situations can lead to feelings of sadness and helplessness. To maintain my emotional equilibrium, I’ve had to limit my exposure to news. -
A Busy Schedule Can Be Overwhelming
I used to feel guilty about not wanting to fill my kids’ schedules with activities. However, I’ve embraced my homebody nature and realized that my kids seem to thrive in a similar environment. We enjoy fun adventures, but we prefer to keep them moderate. -
We Love Our Kids, but Need Space
I adore my children more than anything, but constant interaction can be overwhelming. After nearly a decade of being a stay-at-home mom, I realize how important it is for me to have time alone to recharge. Many moms share this sentiment, but for sensitive moms, taking breaks is essential for our well-being.
What we highly sensitive moms most need is understanding. Our quiet moments and need to retreat are not personal; they’re simply part of how we navigate our world. Yet, our biggest strength lies in our capacity to love deeply—whether it’s for our children, friends, or even strangers. We ask that you treat our hearts with care.
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In summary, being a highly sensitive mom comes with a unique set of challenges, from navigating social situations to managing emotional overload. Understanding our needs and accepting the importance of breaks can help us thrive as mothers while maintaining our emotional well-being.