I recently found myself cleverly negotiating with my kids without them realizing it. I promised them ice cream if they tidied their rooms and cleaned the bathrooms. This tactic is my secret weapon for getting them to tackle homework, behave while shopping, or simply stop talking. While a little sugar and screen time can work wonders, sometimes a little white lie does the trick as well. I’ve come to realize that many parents engage in a bit of deception, and there’s no reason to feel guilty about it. Most of us are just trying to survive the chaos of parenting. Before I had kids, I naively thought that simply saying “no” or giving direct orders would be enough; I quickly learned that I needed to get a little more creative.
- I claim the toy store is closed.
I can’t bear to drag myself through that overwhelming place again, so I just tell the kids it’s closed until I’m ready to face it again. - I disguise their vegetables.
Kids typically turn their noses up at greens, so I blend them into smoothies or pasta sauce. If they catch a glimpse, I just deny it and promise to blend better next time. - I remind them that Santa is always watching.
This little reminder comes in handy year-round, even in July! It’s a great way to keep them in line, especially after the holiday season. - I “accidentally” eat their treats.
When they find their holiday goodies missing, I’ll insist it must have been someone else. Who could resist a late-night snack, right? - I use my kids as an excuse to skip social events.
“Sorry, we can’t make it—my kids are sick,” I’ll say, even if they’re perfectly fine. Some days, I just can’t handle the thought of socializing. - I tell them cookie dough is dangerous.
To keep the cookie dough all to myself, I claim it’s poisonous! No one wants to risk food poisoning, right? - I threaten to take away screen time, then give it back.
I often shout about screen time consequences, but when it comes down to it, I just can’t follow through. Sometimes, the battle isn’t worth it. - I feign illness to dodge playdates.
When a fellow parent calls asking for a playdate, I can suddenly catch a cold. One extra child is enough to send me over the edge. - I exaggerate about money.
“Oh wow, socks are ridiculously expensive now!” I say while hiding my new boots. It’s more fun than just admitting I bought something new. - I keep special moments a secret.
I tell my kids not to share the details of our one-on-one outings. If they start bragging, it takes away the magic of our special time together. - I bend the truth at doctor’s appointments.
When asked, I’ll claim my kids hardly eat sugar or watch TV, all while hoping they cooperate so we can grab burgers afterward.
While these may not be my proudest parenting moments, I know I’m not alone in using a little cunning to navigate the ups and downs of motherhood. My kids have become my perfect excuse to avoid social engagements, and I plan to keep using it as long as I can. After all, wouldn’t you rather hear about the times I stumbled than the times I was a perfect parent?
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In summary, parenting often requires a bit of creativity and, yes, some deception. Whether it’s to keep the peace or maintain a semblance of control, these little tricks help us manage the daily chaos.