Recently, my sister-in-law welcomed her second child, a hefty little one weighing in at 10 pounds 12 ounces. Cradling that adorable bundle stirred a wave of nostalgia within me, and I might have shed a few tears as I rocked that cherubic mass of baby rolls. But I wasn’t misty-eyed because I yearned for another child; that ship has sailed, thanks to some well-placed snips in my husband’s anatomy. No, the tears were a reminder of how incredibly simple babies are compared to toddlers.
With a 3-year-old and a 4-year-old at home, I often fantasize about trading them in for a newborn — even one that cries incessantly. When a baby cries, it’s for straightforward reasons: hunger, fatigue, or a dirty diaper. Those are emotions I can easily empathize with; I’ve shed tears for similar reasons, like when I muster the willpower to exercise during that time of the month only to have an embarrassing mishap. Toddlers, however, are a different story. Their reasons for crying often defy logic. Just today, my daughter sobbed because her brother took her imaginary rocket ship. Yes, she was upset over something that doesn’t even exist. The parenting guides fail to prepare you for these moments; no one tells you they’ll cry over spilled milk or cereal, or even because their cereal is in the wrong bowl. They scream because you helped them put on their shoes — a task they specifically asked you to do.
Babies are content to lie quietly in their crib, on the floor, or in someone’s arms, occasionally drooling with excitement. Just give them a wall to stare at, a ceiling to gaze up at, or perhaps a colorful dinosaur to focus on, and they are perfectly happy. They are, without a doubt, the easiest beings to entertain. You don’t even have to be actively engaging with them; they’re simply soaking in the world around them in peace.
In stark contrast, little kids seem to be in a constant state of motion. Sitting still for even a moment seems to be an unbearable challenge for them. It’s as if they fear their muscles might explode if they aren’t in continuous motion. And even when they do sit, they manage to be raucously noisy. I never knew it was possible to sit quietly yet noisily until I became a parent. Plus, those days of being able to ignore a baby are long gone. Every few seconds, one or both of my children demand, “Mom! Watch this!” They expect my undivided attention at all times, and it can be utterly exhausting.
Feeding babies is another aspect I miss. Just offer them a breast, a bottle of breastmilk, or formula, and they’re good to go. They don’t complain about the taste, they don’t throw tantrums about their food preferences, and they certainly don’t hurl the bottle at you, declaring they hate it. They simply consume their meal, let out a satisfied burp, and continue their baby adventures.
I love my children, and I appreciate the fact that they can play, talk, and engage with the world. There are upsides and downsides to every stage of childhood. But some days, I would willingly trade a limb for the chance to hold a baby again. They don’t argue back, they don’t bicker with siblings dozens of times a day, and they certainly don’t have debates over who gets the last yogurt. They just lie there and drool, much like I do after my toddlers have demanded my attention for the umpteenth time before my first cup of coffee.
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In summary, while I cherish the joys and challenges of raising toddlers, there are moments when I deeply miss the simplicity of having a baby. They are easy to entertain, require straightforward needs, and bring a unique kind of joy that is hard to replicate in the whirlwind of toddler life.