Dear Jake,
I hope this message finds you well. I’ve noticed you’ve had a challenging week.
The other evening, I was cozied up on the couch with my 7-year-old daughter, sharing warm tea while watching remarkable athletes make history at the Olympics—Simone Biles among them. We were intentional about watching this event; Simone is an adoptee, just like my daughter. She’s a strong Black girl, reflecting my daughter’s identity. Witnessing Simone’s strength on the gymnastics floor and seeing my little girl’s eyes glow with excitement felt like pure magic.
Then, you spoke out of turn. As the camera shifted to Simone’s family, you casually stated that the individuals she refers to as her mom and dad are actually her grandparents.
Allow me to clarify why she calls them mom and dad: because they are her mom and dad.
Your dismissal of this reality didn’t stop there. When members of the adoption community, including myself, called you out on Twitter (what we refer to as a clapback), you continued to dig yourself deeper until your employer had to step in, prompting you to delete your comments and apologize.
I suspect you complied to protect your own interests, but it seems you may not fully grasp why our community is so upset. Let me enlighten you.
As a mother through adoption, I am not merely an “adoptive mom.” Adoption was a singular legal act that established me as my children’s mother.
I am not a “fake mom.” Everything I do for my children is genuine. I don’t clean up pretend messes or fake cuddle time. I don’t feign enthusiasm while reading bedtime stories or driving them to school and activities.
I am not a “pretend mom.” I don’t pretend to research health topics or comfort my child after a nightmare. I actively guide them in sharing, manners, and understanding their emotions.
I am a mother by adoption, but I recognize that I am not my children’s only mother. I understand the importance of allowing my kids to express their feelings about their biological parents without forcing them to choose between families.
I am not irrelevant in their lives. Every interaction I have with my children matters. I may not always understand the impact of my presence, but I know they thrive on the support and love I provide. Like every parent, I strive to do my best.
I proudly embrace my role as the mother to three incredible, intelligent, and joyful children. Regardless of how they choose to refer to me or their biological parents, I will always accept and cherish those titles. I teach my children that people like you, who struggle to accept that adoption creates real families, are limited in their understanding of life.
Your narrow-minded views won’t define us.
The little girl sitting next to me on the couch? She’s my real child—no qualifiers needed. I am her mom, plain and simple.
So, in future broadcasts, as you narrate significant events, please show respect for the talented young athletes and their families—their real families—who support them.
As a mom, here’s some unsolicited advice: Stay in your lane. Refrain from criticizing Simone Biles and her family. If you can’t share something positive, perhaps it’s best to keep your thoughts to yourself and avoid spreading negativity on social media.
Thank you for listening.
If you want to dive deeper into the topic of home insemination, check out this interesting resource on home insemination kits. Additionally, for those considering their options, this guide provides fantastic insight into the IVF process. For parents on the go, Infant Travel Guides can be an excellent source of information.
In summary, it’s essential to recognize the authentic relationships formed through adoption and to respect the identities of those involved.