At seven months pregnant, I found myself once again sifting through maternity tops. I pulled one from the stack and struggled to get it on. As I gazed into the mirror, I frowned at my reflection. “This shirt just doesn’t look right,” I thought, only to be taken aback by the realization of that sentiment.
For three decades, I battled with my weight, constantly criticizing my body. Each time I stepped into a dressing room, it became an exercise in self-loathing, with the only variable being the intensity of my disappointment. It was always my body that fell short, never the clothes themselves.
However, that day marked a turning point—I realized that pregnancy had fundamentally shifted my perspective. I felt beautiful; I adored my growing bump and everything it represented. The kindness I received from others only amplified my joy. I was fortunate enough to have what some affectionately call a “unicorn pregnancy,” experiencing few discomforts.
My pregnant mind convinced me that I looked fantastic, and I expected my clothes to reflect that. Any shirt that didn’t flatter me was simply not cute. I felt liberated. I reveled in horizontal stripes and sought out tops that highlighted my figure. For the first time in my life, I genuinely enjoyed looking in the mirror.
Unfortunately, that wave of body positivity faded almost immediately after my daughter was born. I underestimated how long it would take to lose the baby weight and struggled with nursing tops that felt too tight. I clung to my maternity jeans postpartum, embarrassed when strangers in the grocery store asked when I was due. Somehow, I found myself back at square one.
Fast forward two years, and I’m now five months pregnant again. This time, I eagerly reached for my box of maternity clothes early in my pregnancy, excited to embrace that positive mindset again. While I still have moments of insecurity—starting this journey with 20 extra pounds from my first pregnancy—I am determined to reclaim that joy.
I love my belly once more. I wear outfits I wouldn’t have dared to try otherwise, donning fitted tops with yoga pants without a second thought. Sometimes, I worry that others might mistake my shape for simply being overweight, but ultimately, that’s their issue, not mine. Oh, how I wish to hold onto this confidence beyond these fleeting moments.
I aspire to raise my daughters to appreciate their bodies and instill in them the belief that they are beautiful as they are. I want them to understand that clothes should enhance our beauty, and if they fall short, it is not our bodies that are at fault. The opinions of others about our bodies are irrelevant.
These are truths I want to embody, yet I find myself only fully realizing them in brief instances. This time, I am committed to practicing self-love and recognition of my beauty. With five months left, I am ready to train my mind to embrace my worth.
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In summary, my journey through body positivity during pregnancy has been transformative yet challenging. I strive to embrace my body and encourage my daughters to do the same, hoping to nurture a more loving perspective on self-image.