Earlier this academic year, an incident at Stanford University involving Brock Allen Turner highlighted the disturbing realities of sexual violence when he assaulted an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. Around the same time, my 11-year-old daughter received her first cell phone. A few months later, I overheard a shocking phone call where a boy shouted, “I just want you to know that I think you’re a total jerk!”
Brock’s victim regained consciousness in a hospital, disoriented and confused, with no memory of the assault and her underwear missing. She left without disclosing the traumatic event to her loved ones for weeks. When I asked my daughter about the boy’s call, she dismissed it, claiming such comments were commonplace among boys her age. She insisted it didn’t bother her and avoided discussing it further with me or my partner.
Brock’s father infamously stated that the punishment his son faced was “a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action,” asserting that incarceration wasn’t the right response for Brock. When I reached out to the boy’s parents, his father suggested we allow the children to “work it out,” insisting that the boy was remorseful and that my daughter had always been kind to him. His mother promised to return my call but never did.
During the Brock Turner trial, the victim was subjected to invasive questioning about her sexual history and behavior, while Brock claimed consent. I faced a similar situation when people questioned whether my daughter somehow provoked the boy’s actions. Our friends even speculated that the boy’s outburst was due to a crush on her. Ultimately, Brock received a mere six-month sentence in county jail—far less than the potential 14 years—because the judge feared incarceration would adversely affect his life.
I reported the boy’s behavior to the school, but the counselor downplayed the incident, claiming boys didn’t understand the impact of their words and suggesting that they simply mimic what they see in media. He assured me that the boy would be embarrassed if confronted and that the incident didn’t occur on school grounds.
This is where rape culture begins—at an early age, often unnoticed until tragic events unfold and lives are shattered. We must take action. It’s essential to educate young boys to respect girls and encourage young men to listen to and protect women. We need to ensure that consequences align with the severity of the crime.
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In summary, addressing the early signs of rape culture is crucial for fostering a respectful environment for future generations. We must be proactive in teaching our children about consent and respect, ensuring that we do not overlook harmful behaviors that can escalate into serious issues.