Yesterday, my son truly made me laugh. Not in a typical “he’s adorable” way, but in a genuine “he’s actually funny” manner. He told a knock-knock joke, and his timing was spot-on; it was one of those moments where laughter felt effortless. It was a fleeting yet precious reminder, amidst the demands of parenting, of the joy that can shine through the chaos.
Parenthood is perhaps the toughest role one can take on. It’s a relentless cycle of exhaustion and responsibility, with no real breaks. Sure, there are fleeting moments of relief—when you finally hear your child’s soft breathing at night or when they play quietly. But those moments are often overshadowed by a constant weight of worries.
It’s all too easy to succumb to negativity—the attitude issues, behavioral challenges, slipping grades, or even the cereal ground into the carpet.
Questions swirl endlessly in a parent’s mind: How can I get my child to eat more veggies? Is my daughter facing bullying at school? Will my baby ever sleep through the night? Should we be putting money aside for college? What if they don’t get accepted into their desired school? Is it possible to afford both soccer and basketball? Shouldn’t he know his numbers and colors by now? These concerns can feel overwhelming, and it’s simple to become fixated on the negatives—the arguments, the messes, the worries.
In those stressful moments, when anxiety starts to creep in, I consciously choose to seek out joy. I focus on the little victories. For instance, my son climbed into my bed only three times last week instead of five—that’s progress! My kids have started to clear their dishes without being asked, and I can’t help but smile when I see my daughter twirling in her favorite dress, inventing silly songs.
There was also that memorable moment when my son proudly declared he had to use the potty all by himself—evidence that I must be doing something right amidst the chaos. Each time my daughter tells a knock-knock joke, I store that moment in my heart, treasuring the pure joy it brings.
We must decide whether to let ourselves be weighed down by anger and uncertainty or to actively seek out moments of joy and hold onto them tightly.
Sometimes, you have to get down on your hands and knees, metaphorically speaking, to find these bright spots that spark joy. These are the moments that truly matter in parenthood. We don’t rise each day just to resolve conflicts or tackle endless homework; we do it for these joyful instances. If we neglect to acknowledge them, we risk being consumed by the burdens of parenting, and as parents, we don’t give in to despair. We fight for happiness, for joy.
It’s a conscious choice we must make. We can be weighed down by the heaviness of our worries, or we can seek out joy and cling to it. I choose joy.
This article was originally published on May 13, 2023.
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In summary, parenting is a challenging journey filled with both trials and beautiful moments. By actively choosing to focus on the joy amidst the chaos, we can make our experience more rewarding.