I’m not particularly difficult to satisfy. I don’t require high-end dining or spa retreats to feel like I’m on holiday. However, labeling my maternity leave as a vacation is so far off the mark that it borders on absurdity.
If you’ve just nurtured an entire human being within your body, only to have that little one emerge and cry incessantly for three months, referring to that time as a vacation is downright insulting. Allow me to clarify:
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Sleep
Vacation: Waking up leisurely, basking in morning light with your partner, and enjoying a slow start to the day.
Not a Vacation: Being jolted awake every one to three hours to feed a newborn with the ferocity of a hungry piranha. You catch a glimpse of your exhausted self in the mirror and wonder if you’ll ever feel rested again. -
Breastfeeding
Vacation: Relaxing on the beach, your body soaking up sun while you sip a refreshing drink.
Not a Vacation: Painful, swollen breasts that feel like they’re about to explode, regardless of whether you choose to breastfeed. If you experience mastitis (which I did—not once, but twice), you get to deal with an infection while still nursing. -
Hydration
Vacation: Enjoying cocktails and your drink of choice, whenever you desire.
Not a Vacation: Chugging gallons of water daily to maintain milk production, leaving you longing for anything but H2O. -
Company
Vacation: Spending time with excited friends and family who share in your joy.
Not a Vacation: Being accompanied by a tiny, wailing creature who is still adjusting to life outside the womb. -
Scenery
Vacation: Exploring new places and marveling at your surroundings.
Not a Vacation: Staring at the four walls of your bedroom, feeling cold, hungry, and trapped as your baby cries for attention. -
Bodily Functions
Vacation: Focusing solely on your own needs.
Not a Vacation: Navigating your own body while also caring for a newborn who seems to have come from another planet, complete with all the challenges of feeding and diapering. -
Emotional State
Vacation: Experiencing joy and perhaps a few happy tears.
Not a Vacation: Crying for hours in a fit of frustration while your partner looks on, wondering if you’re okay—spoiler alert: you’re not. -
Self-Image
Vacation: Feeling carefree about your appearance.
Not a Vacation: Feeling like a whale and going on a shopping spree to find clothes that fit, only to still feel uncomfortable in your own skin. -
Culinary Delights
Vacation: Indulging in gourmet meals and the finest drinks.
Not a Vacation: Forgetting where the kitchen is, and fearing that anything you eat might lead to sleepless nights for you and your baby due to tummy troubles. -
Intimacy
Vacation: Enjoying romantic evenings and personal connection.
Not a Vacation: Feeling so unappealing that the thought of intimacy makes you want to run away.
Babies are undeniably wonderful, but let’s be clear: maternity leave is not a vacation. It’s a challenging, exhausting, and transformative experience.
For those looking for more information about pregnancy and home insemination, Mount Sinai’s Infertility Resources is an excellent resource. You can also explore Make a Mom’s Fertility Supplements for helpful fertility supplements. If you’re interested in recipes to help fuel your postpartum journey, check out Flavorful Thai Lettuce Wraps that are super easy to make.
Summary
Maternity leave is often misconstrued as a vacation, but the reality is far more complex. New parents face sleepless nights, physical discomfort, emotional roller coasters, and an overwhelming adjustment to life with a newborn. Understanding this can help shift the narrative around maternity leave from a trivialization to a recognition of the hard work and dedication it truly entails.