When I was a child, conforming to the norms of my social circle was a given. We all dressed alike, listened to the same tunes, and frequented the same party spots every weekend. This pattern continued until we graduated, at which point we all chose different paths—college for some, the workforce for others, while a few floundered in uncertainty. I belonged to the latter group.
Throughout my formative years, I mimicked those around me, adhering to societal expectations that dictated what skills I should acquire. This left me ill-prepared for life after school. My attempts at higher education were met with struggles, and I ultimately didn’t succeed. My teachers had let me coast through grades, as I was the class clown who elicited their sympathy.
While one might think my reflections are aimed at youngsters, my true audience is parents. I often wish that my own parents had urged me to embrace my uniqueness, to dare to be different, and to cultivate my creativity. Unfortunately, that never occurred.
Now, as a father of twin boys who are just six months old, I find myself contemplating their future daily. I wonder what kind of individuals they will become, whether they will face bullying, find popularity, or express creativity. This is a natural inclination for most dads. I don’t aim to control their lives or dictate every step; instead, I hope to support them through challenges that life presents.
My objective is to know when to push them forward and when to allow them space. I recognize that each person must carve their own path, make choices, and take control of their destiny. However, I also believe that parents play a crucial role in imparting these lessons early on.
I may not possess a foolproof method for raising children—I’m still new to this journey—but my primary aim is to encourage my boys to think independently without alienating them. I want them to understand that fear is a choice, and it’s okay to choose it at times. I plan to teach them that fitting in doesn’t equate to authenticity. Education is vital, even when it seems perplexing. Most importantly, I aspire to be a listening ear and pray for wisdom in my responses.
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In summary, my goal as a father is to nurture independent thinkers who can navigate their own paths in life. By fostering creativity and resilience, I hope to prepare my children for the challenges that lie ahead.