Before you entered this world, I had no real grasp of love’s true essence. I didn’t recognize it as a vast universe, full of mass and ever-expanding into realms I had yet to discover. My heart, though unchanged in its physical form, has learned to contain an ever-growing love that fills it to the brim. Becoming your mother taught me to embrace this beautiful, heavy love.
Love is the warmth of holding you for the very first time, tears flowing for countless reasons. It’s the struggle against fatigue as I rock you back to sleep in the middle of the night. It’s brushing back your hair and sharing hushed whispers in the dark. I recognize that these peaceful moments are fleeting. In the morning, you might stomp around, frustrated that your favorite shirt isn’t clean. “Why didn’t you do the laundry?” you might demand, your tone sharp and unreasonable. While I could explain myself or suggest you tackle your own laundry, I choose not to engage in conflict. Instead, I pour my love into the simple act of making you a peanut butter, honey, and banana sandwich. Sometimes love is simply unspoken.
I understand that being 13 can be incredibly challenging. It might seem like your appearance, possessions, and social media presence define who you are. These are fleeting metrics, much like a striking lightning storm—intense for a moment but quickly fading. There will be more profound experiences and discussions ahead that will truly shape your identity. Ultimately, your essence will be about your words, your actions, and how you impact those around you.
There’s a significant difference between loving someone and being in love. You will feel it, and it will be akin to soaring without wings, a dream where you possess extraordinary powers and suddenly find yourself weightless. Remember, not every love will be reciprocated, and there will be times of heartache and disappointment. Yet, through these experiences, you’ll uncover the vital importance of loving yourself. Aim to be genuine, to understand your beliefs and feelings, and to embrace kindness for yourself and others. This isn’t always easy, and I’m still navigating it myself.
Love may ebb and flow but never truly disappears from your heart. Keep the memories of love, even those that have faded or hurt. Treasure them for what they taught you. I often think back to my first love, the way he’d wait by my locker just to exchange goofy smiles. I remember the sweet moments, alongside the bitter ones, and know that both have contributed to who I am. Be wary of confusing infatuation or desire with true love—though I know it can be difficult. Always remember: There is no love in causing pain.
Your first loves, whether for a person, a book, or a band, will hold a unique place in your heart. Just as U2 defined my youth, 5 Seconds of Summer may resonate with you. My cherished book, The Mists of Avalon, mirrors your love for Divergent. Your experiences with love will vary throughout life, sometimes fierce and vibrant, other times leaving you questioning their value. Seek the meaning. Cherish the little things, like a raindrop clinging to a budding cherry blossom branch, enough to capture it for social media.
As you grow, my love will evolve alongside you. It’s not easy to watch you carve your own path, sometimes filled with rebellion and frustration, other times showcasing your independence in decision-making. The bond we’ve shared is now transforming into something that allows you to explore the vast world ahead. As you prepare to step into your future, I’ll carry with me the wise words of Sting: If you love someone, set them free. Just remember to take my love with you wherever you go.
In summary, this letter serves as a heartfelt reminder of the journey of love—a journey that expands with each passing day, filled with challenges and joys. As you navigate your teenage years, embrace your evolving identity, cherish your experiences, and always remember the importance of self-love.