I made my first true friend when I was just three years old, after my family relocated from Philadelphia to a remote area in Pennsylvania’s Appalachian Mountains. One of my earliest memories is of racing down our long, dusty driveway to meet her. Back then, that driveway felt endless, and my parents observed from the window as I approached her for the first time. She was a year older and the only girl in a bustling household of brothers. From that moment on, we were inseparable. Two dark-haired girls with ponytails, we spent our days playing in the woods, emulating the Dukes of Hazzard, while learning the essence of friendship.
Over the years, I’ve met countless friends as I’ve journeyed across different countries and cities. I’ve navigated various life phases, often with a friend by my side. Some relationships have stood the test of time, while others faded, revealing that not everyone you meet will remain a friend. With nearly 37 years of friendship experience, I’d like to share some important lessons I’ve gathered along the way:
- True Friends Don’t Judge Based on Appearances.
Real friends are unconcerned about your looks, your home, or your social status. Whether you’re rocking trendy boots or clinging to your 1995 Birkenstocks, a genuine friend simply doesn’t care. - Friends Make the Effort to Connect.
They carve out time from their busy lives to check in on you, whether it be through a quick text, a brief email, or a phone call amidst the chaos of kids or pets. They may not always know exactly how you’re doing, but their care shines through. - Friends Are Your Greatest Supporters.
When you achieve something, a true friend is your loudest cheerleader. They celebrate your victories and recognize your unique skills, fostering a mutual uplifting spirit that strengthens your bond. - Disagreement Is Natural.
You won’t always see eye to eye, and that’s perfectly okay. Friends respect each other’s opinions and understand that differing views do not undermine the friendship. - Distance and Time Don’t Diminish Real Friendships.
I recently reconnected with an old friend after six years apart, and we found ourselves laughing until we cried, just like we did in our younger days. Time may pass, but true friendship remains intact. - Acceptance of Imperfection Is Key.
You will both make mistakes, but that’s part of being human. A true friend will address any issues directly, understanding that maintaining a friendship requires effort and communication.
Friendships evolve as we navigate different chapters of our lives. Often, they deepen through shared interests or the experiences of parenthood. As mothers, these friendships take on new dimensions, influencing how we teach our children about being good friends.
It’s essential to remember that friendships aren’t forced. If someone wants to be your friend, they will naturally gravitate towards you. So cherish those close to you. In fact, why not take a moment to reach out and express your appreciation? And to my childhood friend, the one I shared those Dukes of Hazzard afternoons with—thank you for showing me what true friendship means. I hope my daughter finds a friend just like you.
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Summary:
Friendship is a vital part of life that transcends appearances, time, and distance. True friends support each other, respect differences, and understand that imperfections are part of being human. Cherish your friendships and reach out to loved ones, as these connections enrich our lives in profound ways.