How do you manage work-related travel while raising two young children at home? This is a question I encounter frequently, as I often find myself away for a few days each week, leaving behind my 4- and 6-year-old. My instinctive response might be something like this: “I typically pack the night before, head to the airport the next day, park, board the plane, work, return, plead with my husband to handle the laundry, then come to terms with the fact that my pleas were in vain and I must do it myself.” But I know that’s not what people are after; they want to hear about my guilt over leaving my kids and my worries about missing precious moments. While those feelings do creep in, I also recognize the positive aspects of my situation.
Many working parents grapple with guilt about leaving their children. Yes, there are times I feel sad and moments I miss, but ultimately, I am engaged in work that I love and that can potentially make a difference in others’ lives. I strive to explain my job to my kids in a way that resonates with them, so they understand how I contribute to the world. Here are some strategies that help me maintain balance and keep my sanity intact while traveling for work:
1. Supportive Partner
I’m fortunate to have a capable husband who steps up admirably while I’m away. It’s a bittersweet realization that my travels have strengthened their bond, as my kids learn that their dad can meet their needs just as well as I can. This shift, while difficult to accept, allows my husband to parent in his style, which is beneficial for everyone.
2. A Strong Support Network
I have cultivated a fantastic community of friends, neighbors, and caregivers who support one another. Whenever we’re in a bind, we can count on our village. We frequently help each other out, and our kids likely think they’re all part of one big family!
3. Understanding Employer
My job allows me to work from home when I’m not traveling, providing the flexibility to engage with my family in ways that a traditional, on-site job wouldn’t. My employer appreciates that some of my most productive hours occur after my children are asleep. This flexibility has deepened my loyalty to the company.
4. Protecting My Schedule
I guard my work schedule fiercely, and I only make exceptions for compelling reasons. I can often plan my travel around significant family events, and I always explore options to stay involved remotely. I understand that this may limit certain career advancements, but I’m perfectly okay with that right now, as this phase of life won’t last forever.
5. Leveraging Technology
Tools like FaceTime have been invaluable for staying connected with my family. They allow me to help with homework, join bedtime routines, and introduce my kids to my colleagues. I prioritize these connections, even stepping away from work commitments to chat with my children when I’m on the road.
6. Small Gestures Matter
I love leaving little notes in my kids’ lunchboxes to remind them that I’m thinking of them. It’s a delightful surprise for them to find a note from me just as I leave for a trip.
7. Quality Time at Home
When I return, I make a conscious effort to disconnect from technology and be present with my kids. There are days when I struggle with this, but I remind myself that my children won’t be little forever, and they genuinely want to spend time with me.
8. Traveling Together
Whenever possible, I try to bring my kids along on work trips, especially during the summer. This not only allows us to bond but also gives them a glimpse into my work life. Sometimes, I even have a friend accompany us to help care for them while I’m busy.
9. Nurturing Our Relationship
My husband and I prioritize our connection, even when I’m away. We need to communicate and stay aligned as we navigate parenting together, and we make a concerted effort to support each other.
This lifestyle isn’t for everyone, and it certainly comes with challenges. I cherish both my job and my family, and I’m continually learning how to balance the two. Some days are more challenging than others, but that’s simply part of life. It’s essential to be kind to myself and find joy along the way.
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Summary
Balancing work and family as a traveling mother requires a supportive partner, a strong network, understanding employers, and effective time management. Utilizing technology, valuing small gestures, and maintaining quality time with family are essential strategies for managing the complexities of this lifestyle.