Growing up in a household filled with girls, my understanding of boys was limited. I was raised by my single mother alongside my sister, and aside from a few male acquaintances, my interactions with boys were few. The male perspective in my life began to broaden when I met my husband, who became my closest friend and helped me realize that boys have a softer, more nuanced side beyond their reputation for being rowdy and mischievous. However, when I found out I was pregnant with my first son, I felt a wave of uncertainty wash over me. The thought of raising a boy—who I imagined would be made of “snips and snails and puppy dog tails”—was daunting.
As I navigated the ups and downs of raising two boys, I discovered valuable lessons about their unique traits and about myself. My first son, who is approaching the age of 9, continues to amaze me with his individuality. His charming “boyishness” is one of the most delightful aspects of his character. Here are nine key takeaways from my journey as a mother of boys:
- Diaper Direction Matters: I quickly learned that keeping a baby boy’s penis pointing downward in his diaper is crucial. Despite the best diapers, if not tucked in properly, expect unexpected surprises. Once toddlers learn to reach into their diapers, all bets are off—most nighttime accidents happened when their anatomy was pointing the wrong way!
- Boys and Their Bodies: My husband has reassured me countless times that boys can be tough on their bodies. I’ve often asked, “Is it really okay for him to do that to his penis?” The answer is always yes, even when they are tugging, twisting, or engaging in bizarre antics with their anatomy.
- Tears Are Okay: Contrary to the stereotype that boys must be tough, they cry over both big and small things. Their feelings deserve validation, and I make it a point to let my boys know that crying and expressing emotions is a strength, not a weakness.
- Boundless Energy: While girls can be energetic too, my experience suggests that boys often come with an extra dose of wildness. If they’ve been indoors for too long, they can turn the house upside down, bouncing off walls and climbing on furniture. It’s exhausting yet often hilarious—provided no one gets hurt.
- No Gender Constraints: I never imposed traditional notions of what toys my boys should prefer. To my surprise, they were drawn to pink and purple items early on, including a sparkly tiara and a pink shopping cart, alongside their fascination for trucks. As they grew, societal influences shaped their preferences, but I’m glad they started off without limitations.
- Bathroom Clean-Up is Lifelong: After potty training, I hoped I was done with diaper duty, but boys often struggle to aim accurately. It turns out cleaning up after them is a rite of passage. I even conducted a casual poll on social media and learned that many parents face the same challenge!
- Not All Boys Fit the Stereotype: I assumed that all boys would revel in fart jokes and mud, but that’s not the case with mine. While they enjoy some bathroom humor, they also prefer to stay clean—an unexpected twist!
- Compassion Knows No Gender: My younger son, though only 3, is incredibly empathetic. He senses when I’m upset and offers comforting words, demonstrating that boys can be just as nurturing and sweet as girls.
- Raising Future Men: A significant realization for me was understanding that I’m not just raising boys, but future men. In a world where positive male role models are needed, my job as a mother holds immense importance. Encouraging kindness and emotional expression in my sons contributes to a better society.
The bond between mothers and their sons is unique and profound. While my boys can drive me to the edge of sanity with their antics, I know they respect me deeply as both a mom and a woman. Each day, I feel grateful for the joy they bring into my life.
For more insights into parenting, check out resources like Mount Sinai’s guide on infertility and how to encourage your baby’s laughter. And if you’re interested in enhancing fertility for men, you might consider visiting this fertility booster guide.
In summary, raising boys has been an incredible journey filled with lessons about their behaviors and emotions, as well as my own growth as a parent. I cherish these experiences, knowing they shape the men my boys will become.