Hello! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Life gets busy with work and, well, you know—life! I recently noticed your lovely Instagram post from last weekend and felt compelled to share a little secret that I learned after becoming a mom. You looked stunning in that picture, all dressed up with your husband, enjoying a fancy meal. The atmosphere seemed perfect, and that glass of wine you held? Pure bliss. You must have been thrilled about your date night, excited enough to take a selfie and caption it “#Datenight!” for the world to admire. But here’s the thing you might not fully appreciate yet: when you don’t have children, every night can feel like a date night.
I know you might think that a date requires a lavish setting, elegant attire, or a unique experience. In reality, the essence of a date is simply spending quality time with the one you love. Before having kids, that opportunity is abundant. Whether it’s a casual pizza night because cooking feels like too much, or grabbing frozen yogurt after dinner with friends, those moments count as dates! A hike after work, a movie outing, or a leisurely Sunday drive—all these experiences are dates. Your pre-parenting life is filled with spontaneous moments to connect.
As a parent, especially to a little one who isn’t fond of being left with a sitter, I often feel envious of couples who can easily enjoy date nights. For my husband and me, planning a date takes months of coordination. We need to secure a babysitter, spend money, and hope for a smooth evening without sickness or chaos. If all goes well, we choose a nearby restaurant, keep our phones handy for emergencies, and rush home before my three-hour timer ticks down, worried about milk-stained clothes and a crying baby.
The effort involved in organizing a true dinner out can be so overwhelming that I’ve learned to view even the most mundane activities as dates. Watching Netflix in sweatpants, even if they’re covered in spit-up? If we’re holding hands while the baby sleeps, that’s a date! Bumping into each other at the grocery store while picking up milk? Sharing a shopping cart qualifies as a date! Meatballs at Ikea with the child napping in the stroller? As long as we’re facing each other, I’ll call that a date too.
You’ve probably heard enough from others about the difficulties of parenting and how it can drain your energy. While I wouldn’t trade my son for anything—being a mom brings me immense joy—there are moments when I deeply miss the freedom to connect with my husband on a more regular basis.
So, dear friends without children, cherish those date nights—or should I say, date-lives? Enjoy this time together before the adventure of parenthood begins.
For those considering starting a family, remember to take a look at resources like this one on genetic carrier screening before pregnancy, as it’s crucial to be informed. If you’re interested in home insemination, check out this guide for an at-home insemination kit. And for further family building options, this resource on intrauterine insemination is excellent.
Summary
The article reflects on the joys and challenges of dating before and after having children, emphasizing the importance of cherishing those moments of connection before the responsibilities of parenthood take over.