My husband, Tom, and I have always been planners. We tied the knot in our early twenties and settled into our home soon after. Children were next on our Grown-Up Life checklist, and we welcomed our first two kids without much fuss. Both pregnancies happened quickly, with only one minor hiccup: I struggled with ovarian cysts on one side. After having that ovary removed during my first c-section, I was advised against hormonal birth control due to the risks of promoting growths on my remaining ovary. Copper IUDs didn’t sit well with me either, leaving us with a couple of options: condoms or the pull-and-pray method.
Between our two pregnancies, we relied on condoms. After our second child was born, we used them for a while again but eventually wavered between condoms and the pull-and-pray method. Since we were relatively young when we became parents, we weren’t quite ready for anything permanent, so we endured the inconveniences of barrier methods and occasional well-timed withdrawals. It worked for us—until a few weeks ago.
We enjoy hosting friends for card games and drinks. Nothing too wild, but we all live close and love having our kids play together while we unwind with some pizza and wine. During a recent gathering at our house, I indulged a bit more than usual since neither Tom nor I needed to drive afterward. I’ll be honest—I got a little tipsy.
After our friends headed home and the kids were asleep, a lighthearted conversation about whether we should consider having a third child spiraled into a moment of spontaneity that led us to forgo our usual precautions.
Now, before you judge me for a drunken decision to potentially expand our family, let me clarify: the idea of a third child had been on our minds for a while. We had faced a miscarriage about a year ago, and that baby was planned. It took us some time to revisit that conversation and figure out what we truly wanted before it became too late. While we both desire another child down the line, we weren’t ready for it right then.
The next morning, I woke up with a pounding headache, questioning my sanity. What had I done? As the fog began to lift, flashes of the previous night’s events struck me like lightning. “Did we really do that?” I asked Tom, who had managed to keep his wits about him. He confirmed my fears, and we fell silent, contemplating the implications. I checked the calendar, and the timing was undeniably concerning. Given how easily I get pregnant, I knew there was a solid chance we might be expecting Baby Sushi and Cabernet in 2016.
I could list all the reasons why now wasn’t the right time for this, but it didn’t change the reality of what had happened. I made a mistake, and thankfully, I lived in a state where emergency contraception, commonly known as “Plan B,” was easily accessible at any pharmacy. After discussing it with my husband, we agreed it was the best choice. A third child would be cherished, but we simply weren’t prepared at this moment.
I rushed to get ready, contemplating how I should present myself at the pharmacy. Should I look put-together or disheveled? Would my wedding ring affect the pharmacist’s judgment of me? As I stressed over these trivial details, I remembered that I could have avoided this predicament had I thought things through the night before.
Before I headed out, I did some research. I thought I understood how Plan B worked, but I wanted to be sure. According to WebMD, “Most use the same hormones that are in regular birth control pills. The emergency-use pills mainly work by stopping the release of an egg. The pills also may stop sperm from fertilizing the egg. They also may prevent a fertilized egg from implanting in the uterus.” It doesn’t cause an abortion, as some may believe; it simply prevents pregnancy from occurring. It felt right for my conscience.
To my relief, I found Plan B conveniently located beside the condoms, easily accessible without any judgment from the pharmacist. I grabbed a box along with baby wipes, frozen veggies, and Halloween candy—just another item on my shopping list. At checkout, I joked about needing to separate my “special” purchase to use HSA funds, and the cashier was incredibly discreet, showing no signs of judgment. For $50, I walked out feeling a wave of relief.
When it was time to take the pill, I hesitated. I thought about our future and the fact that we weren’t getting any younger. Maybe this was the nudge we needed to finally commit to that third child we had been contemplating. But in that moment, I realized it simply wasn’t the right time. I filled a glass of water, took the pill, and felt a sense of relief wash over me. I knew I had made the right choice.
Not everyone who needs emergency contraception is reckless or irresponsible. Sometimes, mistakes happen—whether it’s a night of heavy drinking or forgetting to take birth control pills. I never thought this would happen to me, and I felt fortunate to be able to act quickly instead of spending weeks worrying about the outcome. This experience underscored the vital importance of accessible emergency contraception. All women should have the ability to make informed choices about their reproductive health, and I’m grateful to live in a time and place where that option is available.
For more insights on family planning and fertility, check out this excellent resource on fertility treatment. If you’re considering home insemination, you can explore the details in our post about the home insemination kit. And for a deeper dive into related topics, visit Farm to Table Mama.
Summary
In this personal account, a mother in her 30s shares her experience with emergency contraception after an unexpected night of drinks led to a moment of spontaneity regarding a potential third child. She reflects on the importance of accessible reproductive health options and the need for open conversations about family planning.