As I approach the big 4-0, I’ve come to appreciate the wisdom and resilience that a few decades of life experience can bring. Having navigated the complexities of divorce, mental health challenges, and the rollercoaster of motherhood, I’ve learned a thing or two about what truly matters. Here’s a look at five things I’m embracing as I journey through my late 30s.
1. Clarity of Desire
I have a solid grasp on what I want in life—from the type of loungewear that makes me feel cozy (boy shorts, medium, please) to how I prefer to unwind on a Saturday evening (snuggled up with a good book or a movie with my partner). I no longer feel the need to fit into someone else’s mold. With a clear understanding of my strengths, weaknesses, and taste, happiness often comes from simple pleasures, like a scoop of vegan mint chocolate chip ice cream.
2. Confidence in Boundaries
Equally important is knowing what I don’t want, and I’m unafraid to express it. Horror movies? A hard pass. Communication? Texts and emails only, thanks. And when it comes to dinner time, I cherish my peaceful moments and prefer to enjoy my meal in solitude after serving the kids.
3. Resilience in Adversity
I’ve recently opened up about dealing with anxiety, which has been liberating. Rather than wishing my anxious tendencies would vanish, I accept them as part of me. I’ve built a toolbox of coping strategies, including writing—something I recommend for anyone dealing with anxiety. I keep important resources close, like a therapist’s contact info and a prescription for Xanax.
4. Embracing My Body
Over the past few years, I’ve gradually accepted my body as it is. While I might wish for a tighter physique or to shed a few pounds gained over the winter, I recognize that my genetic makeup dictates my shape. I’m focused on health rather than appearance, moving away from the crash diets of my past towards a more accepting and nurturing approach to wellness.
5. Letting Go of Perfection
In my younger years, I had a picture-perfect vision of adulthood. Now that I’m officially an adult, I see the beauty in imperfection. I’m grateful for my loving husband and two healthy children, even if we don’t have all the material possessions I once thought I would. Renting our home and driving an old Honda Civic may not align with my past aspirations, but I’ve learned that true contentment lies in appreciating what we have and finding joy in the journey.
As I look forward to my 40s, I anticipate more growth, acceptance, and resilience. Aging is not just about the physical changes—like gray hairs and creaky joints—but about a deeper understanding of life’s complexities and the strength to navigate them.
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In summary, my late 30s are characterized by self-acceptance, clear desires, and the ability to cope with life’s challenges. I embrace the imperfections and focus on gratitude as I transition into my next chapter.