The choices I made about clothing in my teenage years weren’t driven by a lack of individuality or a keen fashion sense. Rather, I wanted to remain inconspicuous. I instinctively believed that fitting in was essential for social acceptance. I craved recognition for my involvement in activities like drama club and music, but when it came to outfits? I aimed to look like every other girl at school; to me, that was a successful day.
Interestingly, my inclination to blend in may not have been misguided at all. A recent study published in the journal Psychological Science suggests that adolescents who adapt to their peer groups might enjoy better health in adulthood. Research conducted by psychologists at the University of Virginia involved interviews with teenagers from ages 13 to 17, focusing on their best same-sex friends (which changed over the years). These friends provided insights on the quality of the relationship and how well the teens conformed to peer norms. Years later, these individuals were contacted again at ages 25 to 27 to assess their physical and emotional health.
The findings revealed that those who maintained close friendships during their teenage years and exhibited a tendency to conform to social norms reported improved health. This suggests that conforming during adolescence may be a natural inclination that benefits overall well-being. Adolescents often prioritize peer relationships, a fact that anyone who has been a teenager or has one can attest to. As noted by researcher Tom Jacobs, “The intense focus on forming and maintaining friendships may arise from an instinctive awareness of their link to personal well-being.”
I’ve often felt a bit inadequate for not standing out more during my middle and high school years. I found my niche among a group of drama enthusiasts, a subculture with its own set of social norms. Jacobs highlights that the findings from UVA are consistent with another study showing that teenage fans of 1980s heavy metal music grew to be happy, productive adults by conforming to their subculture and deriving support from that identity.
In essence, there are advantages to fitting in with peers. While I wish to inspire my sons to embrace their individuality and disregard peer opinions, the reality is that we are social creatures. Even in adulthood, we adhere to social conventions. For instance, no one would attend a formal wedding in jeans, regardless of how unique they wish to appear.
The real concern for both teens and adults is social isolation. Jacobs emphasizes that while adolescence is a crucial time for discovering personal talents and interests, parents who push too hard for individuality might inadvertently expose their children to future health challenges.
Thus, I won’t fret if my son prefers to wear the same style as his classmates or tends to go along with the crowd (as long as it doesn’t involve major ethical conflicts). Forming strong bonds with his peers is beneficial, even if it means shopping at popular stores like The Limited.
For parents looking for additional insights on supporting their teens, resources such as the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists provide great guidance on pregnancy and home insemination. You can also explore more about the option of a home insemination kit, which is an interesting alternative for those considering starting a family.
In conclusion, encouraging conformity among teens may not be as detrimental as once thought; it can play a crucial role in their health and happiness as adults.