Menu: Parenting
Your Child’s Difficult Behavior: Are You Contributing to It?
by Jessica Lane
Updated: November 16, 2017
Originally Published: July 29, 2015
Picture this: I’m at a local brunch spot, waiting for a table for three when I overhear a conversation from a couple dressed impeccably.
Me: “Table for three?”
Stylishly dressed parents: “Hold on, we need a moment. Sweetheart, what do you wish to eat? Eggs? Should we stay here?”
Toddler: “DAK!”
Stylishly dressed parents: “Oh, okay, honey. Sorry, he wants pancakes. Do you have those? We’ll come back later.”
At first, I chuckle, thinking they must be joking, but they’re not. They glance at me, a mix of confusion and irritation on their faces.
Toddler: “BAAA!”
Stylishly dressed parents: “Sorry, he really wants pancakes. We have to go. But we’ll be back!”
Two things struck me:
First, I assumed “DAK!” meant pancakes, but what on earth does “BAA” signify? Maybe it’s a request for eggs Florentine? Or perhaps he’s just a 14-month-old babbling nonsense?
Second, please, for the love of all that’s good, do not return. Your parenting skills leave much to be desired, and I fear you might influence other new parents in this area. When did toddlers start dictating our brunch choices? Although, to be fair, my own child usually decides my brunch for me, typically an English muffin with cream cheese since I keep those stocked.
We rarely dine out for brunch; my son, at 15 months old, prefers to roam, shout, and toss items. He revels in being the loudest one around and throwing things behind him as if they hold no value. This behavior is perfectly normal for his age, which is why I don’t attempt to confine him to a high chair in public for an hour before I’ve even had my first cup of coffee.
But back to those parents and their culinary toddler. They are letting their child dictate what they eat for breakfast, and that’s just not right. This is why so many children today exhibit problematic behavior; they wield an alarming amount of power. Parents, it’s time to reclaim your authority.
As I write this, my own delightful child is licking the floor and testing his flexibility by attempting to fit his entire foot in his mouth. Do you really think it’s appropriate for this unrefined little creature to determine our brunch venue? Absolutely not.
This brings me to my theory on why we’ve lost control as parents. We’ve become so fixated on “milestones” and whether our children are meeting them that we push them to be advanced beyond their years, often believing our own hype. For instance, your 13-month-old isn’t studying the menu; she’s probably just deciding how much of it she can cram into her mouth. That’s normal and perfectly acceptable. But mistaking those antics for sophisticated decision-making is not.
When we start to think our children possess the same reasoning skills as adults, it becomes easier to let them make choices they’re not equipped to handle. Rarely do parents boast about their child’s penchant for chewing on dirty diapers or their talent for sucking on slippers. Instead, we prefer to highlight their ability to communicate in sign language or select their favorite bedtime story, right?
This creates a vicious cycle. In our effort to compete with other parents and their so-called prodigies, we neglect to address our parenting challenges honestly. We feel pressured to keep up, leading us to push our children beyond their natural capabilities. And before we know it, they’re the ones choosing our brunch spots.
Your child may not be articulating “pancakes”—and that’s perfectly fine. As a parent, you hold the right to decide what you eat for breakfast, and that is also acceptable. Stop viewing your child as a future genius and recognize them as a small being in need of guidance and training. The future of our society may depend on it.
If you’re interested in more about parenting dynamics, check out this post on artificial insemination kits for some insightful information. For signs that may indicate issues with your child’s behavior, visit this authoritative source. And if you’re exploring options for conception, this Wikipedia entry serves as an excellent resource.
Summary:
In modern parenting, many children exhibit challenging behaviors due to parents inadvertently granting them too much power. The article discusses the importance of setting boundaries and recognizing that young children are not equipped to make adult-like decisions. Parents should embrace their role in guiding their children rather than allowing them to dictate family choices. Ultimately, reclaiming parental authority benefits both children and society at large.