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You realize you might feel a bit of resentment towards your partner. Toddlers have a unique talent for testing the limits of your relationship. The chaos of navigating life with a tiny human who can drive you to the brink of insanity can take a toll on your connection. Those without toddlers may find it hard to comprehend how something so adorable could make you fantasize about living alone in a small apartment with just a bottle of wine for company. Just remember, it’s not really your partner you’re frustrated with; it’s the overwhelming nature of parenthood. You’re in a battlefield, and you need your partner as your ally.
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Your daydreams have shifted from aspirations of wealth or fame to thoughts of uninterrupted sleep. You yearn for the luxury of a California King bed where you can stretch out like a starfish. While many associate sleep deprivation with infants, toddlers can be equally relentless in stealing your precious rest. The truth is, you will feel more exhausted than ever, facing nightly antics that will leave you astonished. After all, infants don’t run into traffic or scream directly in your face.
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You find yourself becoming a homebody. If you’re lucky enough to have a backyard, you might prefer to stay in rather than face the ordeal of dressing a toddler, battling car seat meltdowns, and navigating potential public outbursts. Why go through all that when you can simply avoid outings altogether? Online grocery shopping is a lifesaver.
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You’ve had to carry a child out of a store like a bag of groceries, while surrounded by onlookers. Sometimes, you just have to prove a point, even if it means leaving your cart behind. But please, don’t forget to pay for the wine!
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You’ve resorted to opening snacks in stores to keep your little one quiet. It’s not technically stealing—until you forget to pay for it.
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You’ve been forced to inform a store employee that your child has had an accident on the floor. Better that than on a neatly organized display of clothing! Bonus points if your toddler has ever managed to throw up on you in public when you have no spare clothes on hand.
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You sometimes wish you had a time machine… and a condom.
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Stress-induced heart palpitations have become a regular part of your life. It’s not that your child is trying to harm you; it’s just that their antics can be hazardous.
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You’ve contemplated starting anew in a different city. Just be sure to cut up those credit cards; they can track you down.
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Your home resembles a zoo with all the safety gates you’ve installed.
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You’ve learned that saying “My phone is charging” often means “I need you to distract yourself and play with your own toys.”
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Your intimate life has come to a grinding halt. Toddlers serve as natural birth control, leaving you feeling as though your reproductive organs have retreated into hiding.
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You’ve even investigated sleep-away preschools or boarding schools for toddlers.
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You know more about the characters from “Paw Patrol” than you do about your own parents.
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Every cupboard in your home is now secured with some form of lock.
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Bath time resembles an episode of a wild game show.
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You find remnants of all four food groups lodged between your couch cushions.
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You’ve had to say “Stop eating out of the trash” just within the past day.
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A small child has recently used your shirt as a tissue.
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You would trade your molars for a trustworthy babysitter. Who needs to chew when you could be enjoying a night out?
For more parenting tips, check out our post on cryobaby home intracervical insemination syringe kit combo. And if you’re interested in calming your little one, visit calming rituals for some great advice. Lastly, IVF Babble is a fantastic resource for all things pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, parenting a toddler can be a wild ride filled with unexpected challenges, overwhelming exhaustion, and moments that make you question your life choices. Yet, amidst the chaos, there are resources and a community out there to support you.