Dear Friend,
You knew me before I embraced the journey of motherhood with a child who has special needs. We’ve shared countless joyful moments and faced challenges together. There are thoughts I’ve held back, as they are not usually voiced aloud. Since becoming Sophie’s mom, some friends have drifted away, yet you have remained steadfast.
Most days, I navigate feelings of isolation. It’s not that I am physically alone; I am often surrounded by people. However, finding time to connect deeply is rare, especially since our last meeting feels like ages ago. I truly appreciate your thoughtful inquiries, like, “How is your relationship?” and “Are you carving out time for yourself?” These moments of genuine conversation mean the world to me.
I carry guilt for having to decline many of your invitations. Our therapy sessions often overlap with the women’s groups you invite me to. By the time evening rolls around, I’m too drained to consider attending exercise classes. Couple’s retreats feel out of reach without proper respite care. Still, dear friend, your messages remind me I haven’t completely vanished from the world. Thank you for understanding when I have to cancel lunch plans at the last minute; I wouldn’t want a friend like me, yet I truly need a friend like you.
My heart swells with joy when you include Sophie in your plans. I know it takes extra thought, such as checking for wheelchair accessibility, but your efforts warm my heart. Your children possess an innate kindness and inclusivity that is truly inspiring. You are raising wonderful kids, and I’m grateful for that.
There are days that challenge me beyond my limits, and that’s when you step in. You text me during tough times, like surgery days, bring meals when I’m at the hospital, and find ways to support my other children. I often wonder if I could have been as supportive if our roles had been reversed.
While most moms might discuss milestones like potty training or kindergarten readiness, you celebrate Sophie’s achievements, even if they come years later than your son’s. Many others struggle to listen without pity when I share about medications or surgeries, but you listen with empathy and understanding.
Friends like you are essential for parents like me. Please keep inviting me, keep including Sophie, and keep reaching out.
With gratitude,
Your friend
This article was originally published on July 21, 2015. For more insights into parenting, you might find useful information on pregnancy and home insemination at this excellent resource. If you’re curious about other related topics, check out this blog post. Also, for a deeper understanding of gut health, visit this authority on the topic.
Summary:
This heartfelt letter from a special needs mom shares the emotional complexities of navigating friendships and support while raising a child with disabilities. It emphasizes the importance of understanding and inclusive friendships, highlighting the challenges and joys of such a journey.