The Notable Changes Between Turning 30 and Approaching 39

At home insemination

“Don’t say that!” the young hotel shuttle driver exclaimed when I mentioned my age. After enjoying a nice glass of wine during dinner, I decided to strike up a conversation during the ride to my room. “Yes, I’m 39, and I’m perfectly fine with it,” I assured him. He then asked when I graduated high school, and when I replied “1993,” he gasped, “No way! That’s the year I was born!”

Currently, I’m traveling with a musical production of Dirty Dancing (yes, the one that says “nobody puts Baby in a corner”). My partner is part of the orchestra, and for the first seven months, I was quite possibly the oldest “merch girl” in the industry. The show is set to run continuously through the summer of 2016, and we decided it was better to be on the road together than to endure lonely nights filled with disappointing Skype calls.

Now that I’ve moved on from the merch role, I’m finding my rhythm as a writer, reviewing yoga studios, and teaching while we travel across North America for the next year. It feels refreshing to reconnect with my somewhat grown-up self—despite living out of a suitcase and avoiding gatherings where “shots!” are frequently called out.

However, something has definitely shifted over the past year, and I can’t quite shake the feeling of growing older. I’m not saying it’s a negative change—just different. Part of me attributes it to travel fatigue, but I know deep down that I’m officially on this side of my 30s now.

Here are a few observations I’ve made along the way:

1. I’m often addressed as “ma’am.”
2. Getting carded has become a rarity, and when it does happen, it’s usually because everyone is being carded.
3. I’ve noticed a trend: older men are showing interest in me. Sometimes it’s flattering; other times, it’s a bit unsettling.
4. I seem to be invisible to younger men unless they’re seeking a “cougar,” which is, frankly, off-putting.
5. Young women often look at me as if I’m expired food left on the counter.
6. My hair roots seem to grow out more noticeably every ten days—I’m considering embracing grey hair.
7. I have zero patience for subpar food, wine, or company.
8. Speaking my mind is becoming increasingly easier.
9. Some nights, I choose sleep over intimacy.
10. I don’t recognize half of the celebrities on magazine covers at the grocery store, nor do I care to.

Here are a few more revelations I’ve noticed:

1. I’m no longer seen as the cute yoga instructor. For the first time, I feel respected in my profession without needing to prove myself constantly.
2. I allocate time and resources for self-care. I’m my best investment.
3. Vitamin C serum and coconut oil have become essential to my routine.
4. Dessert is a pleasure I indulge in, without guilt.
5. Quality alone time is crucial. I enjoy taking myself out to the beach, dining, and catching movies.
6. I’m learning to ignore negativity. My time is valuable, and I won’t waste it.
7. I take my time with things. What’s the rush? Sometimes, I wish I could go back and shake my younger self for hurrying.
8. I connect with my mom daily, no exceptions.
9. My expectations for my partner have elevated—I know my worth.
10. Insufficient sleep turns me into a “crazy lady.” I prioritize getting enough rest, and when I do, I wake up feeling refreshed.

I chuckle when I glance at my 40-year-old partner. His salt-and-pepper hair and beard somehow enhance his appeal. He can roll out of bed, quickly freshen up, and look effortlessly attractive. Meanwhile, I require a bit of prep time to smooth out my appearance. Not that I’m going for a full-on celebutante look, but a little serum and moisturizer do wonders these days.

I’m embracing my unique lifestyle as I approach 40. I’ve chosen to skip opening night parties, reduce my alcohol consumption, hydrate, meditate, and stay true to myself—and that’s perfectly acceptable. I’m 39, and I’m proud of it.

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In summary, the transition from 30 to 39 is marked by newfound perspectives, self-awareness, and a clearer sense of priorities. Embracing these changes allows for a richer, more fulfilling life.