Our brains are designed to process the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures of our surroundings in a way that allows us to react appropriately. However, for my son, this sensory input can often come across as a chaotic mess.
What feels like a gentle touch or a light spray of water to most people might feel like sandpaper against his skin. Loud noises, such as a flushing toilet or an announcement over a loudspeaker, can bring him to tears. Crowded environments have always posed a significant challenge; they can overwhelm him to the point where his body goes into overdrive. He may run, spin, jump, or even shout at the top of his lungs in an attempt to manage the fight-or-flight response that certain situations trigger.
Visiting places like airports is particularly tough. While he finds the vibrations of a flight soothing, navigating through luggage, security checks, and long lines can be an ordeal. To prepare for our trips, we spend weeks discussing the airport experience and creating a detailed checklist of what to expect. We pack special bags filled with a deep pressure vest, headphones, and comforting toys to help ease his anxiety.
Despite all this preparation, there’s no guarantee that the journey will be smooth. Recently, we returned to New York after a long family visit in Texas. By the time we reached baggage claim, my son was completely overwhelmed and had a meltdown. There I was, sitting on the dirty floor of LaGuardia, trying to manage a screaming 5-year-old while keeping an eye out for our bags and our driver.
I felt like I was on the verge of tears, trying to maintain my composure as I noticed the disapproving stares of onlookers. One woman even remarked, “MY child would never act like that,” as she passed by with a friend. All I wanted was to escape the situation.
Then, unexpectedly, a kind woman who had sat next to me on the flight approached. She gently knelt beside us and asked my son what his favorite jelly bean color was. Surprised, he answered her question. She then suggested he use his pretend binoculars to help spot our luggage, which he happily did.
Before long, our bags arrived, and our driver appeared. I expressed my heartfelt gratitude to the woman; she smiled and went on her way. While there will always be people who don’t understand, there are also individuals like Sarah from New Jersey, who helped remind me that even in my toughest parenting moments, I am not alone. Thank goodness for that.
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In summary, parenting can often feel isolating, especially when faced with challenges that others may not understand. However, unexpected kindness from strangers can provide the reassurance that we are not alone in our struggles.