Ah, summer! The season of joy when you’re exclaiming, “Just five more days until school’s out!” with uncontained excitement. Unfortunately, we may need to part ways. Drinks out? Sure! But I must remove you from my social circle.
Your enthusiasm for endless beach days, spontaneous family outings, and the bliss of having no schedules is simply overwhelming. It’s only been two hours since my kids wrapped up school, and I’m already eyeing the wine glass.
4:32 PM
“Mom, how long is a garden stick? Is it the same as this tape measure?”
“Mom, I’m going to clip this tape measure to my belt loop. See? Like this! You’re not looking… How can you say, ‘I see’?”
“Oh, and Mom, don’t tell Dad when he gets home. I want to surprise him!”
Meanwhile, the kid is glued to a show called “Dog with a Blog,” yet somehow finds the time to check in on my activities.
4:35 PM
“Mom, why are you writing about me?”
“Mom, why did you put a question mark there?”
“Mom, can you pack more cereal in a bag for me?”
“Mom, I’m going to do my homework now. After I finish the cereal. Oh, can I also have a drink?”
“Before you say something like, ‘are your legs broken?’ or ‘did you forget where the refrigerator is?’ it’s not funny! I’m in the middle of my show, so pleEEze get me a drink!”
“Mom, are you writing about me in your blog?”
Did I mention that the child calling me “Mom” is nearly eight? What was I thinking when I sent him to speech therapy at two and a half because he wasn’t talking enough?
4:39 PM
He glances over at his older brother, who is blissfully occupied with his iPad (aka the ultimate babysitter).
“What’s the score? What app are you playing? Can Dad download that for me?”
The older one now interjects because the younger one has decided to measure EVERYTHING around the house, including his brother.
“Stop! You’re being annoying!”
“Stop measuring my foot and my head.”
“Stop measuring Wilsey.”
“Stop!”
“I said STOP!”
“Mom!”
“Mommy!”
“Mooooommmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyy!”
So, to all of you longing for those long, lazy summer days: Enjoy. I may never understand your joy, but I’ll gladly send you my eight-year-old so you can reach for that wine glass alongside me. As for me? I’ll be doing my happy dance come September.
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Summary:
In a humorous take on summer vacation, Miranda shares the struggles of parenting during the school break, highlighting the chaos and noise that comes with having kids at home. Despite the challenges, she finds solace in the anticipation of the school year starting again while playfully suggesting that other parents enjoy the summer days ahead.