Remember those days when a title like this hinted at adventurous intimacy or at least a cheeky email? (Laughing through tears.) Anyway, since you often confide to your best friend about feeling at your wit’s end, why not throw your husband for a loop and make him wonder if you’ve finally lost it? Here are five statements that will surely elevate his heart rate and remind him of your quirky, unpredictable nature.
1. “We’re going to start homeschooling!”
Some people excel at homeschooling, but you are definitely not one of them. Patience isn’t your strong suit, though a quirky sense of humor is. Leave a pile of books on paleontology and Greek mythology on the dining table and announce that you’re quitting your job to homeschool the kids starting tomorrow. Get one of the kids to film his reaction as he delicately tries to convince you that this is a terrible idea.
2. “What do you think about inviting your mom to move in with us?”
This question will surely get his adrenaline pumping as he ponders whether you’ve lost your mind, found religion, or are setting a trap. Then follow it up with, “Oh, right—I remember how your mom and I would end up in a cage match in no time!” He’ll breathe a sigh of relief, but that initial thrill will linger with him throughout the day.
3. “I admit it, I do spend too much money!”
Create a meticulous Excel budget. Track every expense down to the last cent. Start brewing homemade lattes instead of hitting up the local café. Insist that he can’t buy new socks—just “repair” the old ones with actual needle and thread (be sure to buy those first!). Casually mention that your birth control pills are too costly, so maybe it’s time to “see what happens” with a potential fourth child. Talk about spontaneity!
4. “I told your boss’s wife that you work too hard and deserve a raise.”
He’s always wanted you to befriend her, but you’ve been hesitant. Imagine his shock when you reveal that you finally sat down with that old friend for coffee and shared your thoughts on how hard her husband makes him work. Hilarious, right? What, he didn’t find that amusing?
5. “My sister and I are off to Vegas for a week!”
He’s always suggesting you lighten up and embrace a more relaxed approach. Agree with him and announce that you’ll be taking off for a week on a whim. Don’t stress about childcare—after all, he can figure something out for that night he has to travel for work. He’ll find it funny once his blood pressure settles back down!
Remember, there’s nothing worse than a dull marriage! Use these playful tactics to inject some excitement into your relationship, and your husband may not thank you directly, but he’ll appreciate the thrill.
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Summary:
Injecting some fun and unpredictability into your marriage can shake things up and keep your husband engaged. From surprising announcements about homeschooling to whimsical trips, these five statements are sure to elicit a reaction that will keep your relationship lively.