“Dinner’s on the table!” I call out, placing a steaming dish of homemade lasagna in the center of the kitchen. A minute ticks by. Then another. I don’t hear any footsteps approaching. After a moment more, I raise my voice again. “Hey, dinner time!” Finally, my kids drift in, bumping into each other and pulling out their chairs.
“I don’t want lasagna,” one of them scrunches her nose. “Is that spinach? I’m tired of spinach,” another complains. “I want chocolate milk!” yells the youngest.
With an exaggerated sigh, I roll my eyes. Then my eldest pipes up, “Mom, why did you even have us? We’re loud, annoying, and we fight all the time. Oh, and we’re pretty expensive too.” She didn’t mention the fact that I rarely get to use the bathroom alone, or that I’m constantly driving carpools and preparing endless lunches.
“Seriously, why did you want kids?” she asks again.
I flash back to my 30-year-old self, newly engaged. My partner and I were so in love, but we never really discussed having children—neither the number nor the timing. It’s not that I didn’t desire kids; I just didn’t ponder it much. Motherhood felt like the natural next step. Nine months after our honeymoon, I was expecting.
Now, twelve years later, I can’t fully articulate why I chose to have kids, but I can confidently say that I wouldn’t trade them for anything. Despite the chaos, the moments of sheer joy far outweigh the challenges. Here’s what I cherish about being a parent:
Unexpected Joy
Even though my three daughters test my patience daily, they also fill my heart with joy in ways I never imagined possible. Whether it’s my oldest singing beautifully at her first recital, my preschooler proudly showing off her hand-drawn letter “L,” or my 10-year-old throwing her arms around me just to say, “I love you, Mommy,” these moments are pure bliss that words cannot capture.
Living in the Moment
My youngest is a master at living in the now. She doesn’t fret over yesterday or worry about tomorrow, and guess what? She’s genuinely happy. I’ve discovered that when I pause my endless to-do list and join her on the floor to build a foam block doghouse, I find happiness too. Being present, even if just for a moment, is a true gift.
Leadership Skills
With three growing children relying on me for their safety, health, and well-being, I’ve become the authority on everything from treating skinned knees to providing friendship advice. I set bedtimes, meal times, and navigate a myriad of decisions daily. This responsibility has instilled a sense of confidence in me that I never had before.
Learning from Mistakes
Before kids, I was a bit of a perfectionist. Parenthood quickly taught me that mistakes are part of the journey. Tempers flare, bedtimes are occasionally ignored, and dinner might be cereal more often than I’d like to admit. Unless you’re practically perfect (like Mary Poppins, who was just a nanny), parenting is a continuous cycle of trial and error.
Deepened Gratitude
While I’m grateful for the big things like health and shelter, parenting has made me appreciate the little things even more. From a baby’s fever breaking to the joy of playing outside after a rainy spell, or watching my older girls collaborate peacefully on a Lego project, these simple moments are treasures.
Comic Relief
Kids are undeniably funny. The other day, the youngest was whining about being hungry. “Sorry, sweetie,” I said. “No snacks until we get home.” To which my middle child chimed in, “Yeah, mom’s not dealing with you. Been there, raised that.” Laughter is the best remedy for the daily grind of parenthood.
Of course, there are days when I wonder what life might be like without my kids. However, that thought doesn’t linger long because there’s almost always a child asking for a snack, sharing a story, or embracing me just because.
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In summary, while parenting can be hectic and challenging, the love, joy, and growth that come with having kids make it all worthwhile.