In a recent advice column, a mother reached out for guidance regarding her 11-year-old daughter who expressed a desire to start shaving her legs. The mother noted her own lack of recollection about when she began shaving and sought insight on the appropriate age for such a milestone.
The columnist, Anna Greene, suggested that the right time for a girl to start shaving is when she feels self-conscious about her body hair. While 11 may seem young, it’s an individual matter. The girl could be entering puberty and feeling uncomfortable with her leg hair, or she might simply want to fit in with friends who have already begun the practice. Greene recommended a bonding experience between mother and daughter, where they could share tips during a “mother-daughter shaving session.”
However, this advice seems a bit outdated. The notion of a “mother-daughter shaving session” echoes past norms, akin to shopping for girdles or studying outdated etiquette books. The conversation shouldn’t just be about whether to shave or not; it should also encompass the underlying societal pressures that dictate beauty standards. Parents today readily challenge gender stereotypes in many areas, advocating for girls in STEM fields or rejecting traditional notions of femininity. Yet, when it comes to beauty ideals, there seems to be a reluctance to scrutinize these pressures.
Shaving isn’t just a casual choice; it requires time, effort, and money that the beauty industry is more than willing to capitalize on throughout a woman’s life. Many brands, including Gillette, have marketing aimed at tweens, even providing guidelines on how to teach young girls to shave. This normalization of beauty rituals can lead to a lifetime of financial and emotional investment in maintaining these standards.
Young girls should understand that the media and advertisers often fabricate insecurities about their bodies, pushing products to “correct” these imagined flaws. If companies could market a condition like “Hairy Toddler Syndrome,” they likely would, selling razors designed specifically for the youngest audiences. Furthermore, girls should be made aware that once they start shaving, it can be hard to stop. Picture this: on the night of a significant event, a girl could find herself in a frantic race against time in the shower while her male peers seem to have ample leisure time.
While it may be excessive to load an 11-year-old with all these societal implications, parents should still have open conversations about the double standards that exist. Girls are often expected to conform to beauty norms while boys are not. Failing to discuss how these beauty expectations can consume time and resources feels like a missed opportunity for education. This dialogue should be part of a broader conversation parents have with their children, regardless of gender.
It’s surprising that Greene didn’t address these crucial points in her response.
In summary, while the decision to shave should ultimately lie with the individual girl and her family, it’s vital to acknowledge the societal pressures and financial implications that come with such decisions. Parents should engage their children in discussions about beauty standards, helping them navigate these expectations thoughtfully.
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