The days of baby cuddles are behind us, but we still find ways to connect. By April Thompson
It feels like just a moment ago we were sprawled on the floor, tiny yellow construction vehicles in hand. We created elaborate construction scenes using a queen-sized bed sheet filled with uncooked rice, laughing as we dug, dumped, and moved the grains. “I love building dump truck city with you, Mom,” he would say, his little hand resting on my knee.
Now, he’s nearing nine, with strong opinions about his hairstyle, inside jokes with friends, and even a men’s size seven shoe. The afternoons spent in the sandbox and rides on my shoulders have faded away. Without me even realizing it, he’s transitioned from a baby in my arms to a big kid by my side. Our ways of connecting have changed; he’s not as enthusiastic about mother-son cuddle sessions as I wish he would be. So we engage in other activities, often as equals. While it sometimes requires extra effort and creativity, the time spent together is invaluable.
We Play Basketball
In quick pre-dinner games of horse in the driveway, we share laughter and conversation about school and social challenges. I can sense he admires my skills, and when he matches my shots, his grin lights up the entire street. We cover a lot of ground during these games, exchanging secrets on special days. Whether it’s playful banter or sincere encouragement based on the score, I always challenge him to another round, opening the door for more shared moments.
We Sort Pokemon Cards
I’ve become somewhat of a card expert, with my own small collection and knowledge about the game. Together, we organize cards into evolutionary piles and discuss our favorites, analyzing the artistry on display. His impressive memory and excitement when I recall one of his lessons about this unique anime world truly amaze me.
We Draw
Mostly swords. Sitting at the kitchen counter with sketch paper and pencils, we try to create intricate three-dimensional designs. He teaches me techniques he’s learned from art class and YouTube, and we collaborate on our creations, discussing each modification as we go. With every pencil stroke, I aim to understand his world better, asking about his likes and dislikes.
We Build Minecraft Worlds
While I mostly watch, I sometimes get to join in on the creation. We look up “build hacks” to make couch cushions and diving board springs. These quiet, creative moments are oddly therapeutic. As he builds with impressive speed on his iPad, I discover his remarkable spatial reasoning—a skill I hadn’t realized he had. Sometimes we get lost in our imaginary cities, sparking conversations about future dreams and “what if” scenarios. Other times, I simply observe him, soaking in his movements and expressions.
I sometimes miss the times when he would curl up in my lap or rest his head on my shoulder, or when we sang songs while surrounded by bubbles in the tub. However, while those connections felt instinctual, our current interactions are more interesting and meaningful. We carve out this time not out of necessity but because we genuinely want to. It’s a relationship built on love, shared interests, and friendship—constantly evolving as he grows. I eagerly anticipate what lies ahead.
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In summary, as children grow, the ways we connect with them evolve, leading to deeper and more meaningful interactions. From basketball games to drawing, every moment shared fosters a unique bond that strengthens with time.