By: Sarah Jensen
Over the past six years and after four pregnancies, I’ve experienced significant growth in various aspects of my life:
- Physical Transformation: I’ve gained and lost a total of 140 pounds throughout my pregnancies, averaging around 35 pounds each time, influenced by cravings for more chocolate or nachos at different stages.
- Self-Image: I surrendered any remaining sense of trendiness when we purchased a minivan—something I had once promised myself I’d never do because, well, minivans are for the un-cool.
- Control: I’ve abandoned the quest for perfectly coordinated outfits for my children. Honestly, who has the time for that?
- Adaptability: I’ve become incredibly resourceful in handling situations that once seemed overwhelming, like dealing with broken bones (three so far), infant colds (lost count after a dozen), and forgetting crucial items like a Pack ‘n Play during overnight trips. Life goes on, right?
If you’re contemplating having four kids, here’s what you can expect:
- Public Perception: When you venture out with your entire family, prepare for curious stares and odd reactions, as if you’re a circus act. Just the other day at the doctor’s office, I had four people ask if all my kids were mine. Yes, indeed. Here’s a typical barrage of comments I hear throughout the day: “Wow, that’s a lot of kids!” “Did you plan this?” “Better you than me!”
- Memory Challenges: Living day-to-day feels like I’m in a real-life version of the film ‘Memento,’ where I can only remember snippets of time. My mind is like an overloaded internet browser with countless tabs open. Did I pay the utility bill? What day is it? Have the kids eaten any vegetables recently? Amidst the chaos, it’s easy to forget things like jackets, backpacks, and even texting back friends.
- Morning Madness: Getting everyone out the door in the morning resembles a scene from ‘Jumanji.’ Recently, my partner, Mike, had to manage all four kids solo for the first time. When I met him later, he simply said, “That was wild.” And it was—between the toddler crying, the 3-year-old sitting on the baby, and the endless shoe battles, morning routines are anything but calm.
- Nail Clipping: After a shower and a quick nail-clipping session for my children, I realize I’ve just tackled a hundred nails. That could be an interesting band name for us someday.
- Lost Privacy: Any semblance of privacy evaporates. I once tried to sneak in a quick shower only to be interrupted by a child asking if I was done yet to show me a “trick.” By the time I exited, the trick turned out to be a blanket jump.
- Culinary Challenges: Cooking for four picky eaters means you’re almost guaranteed that no meal will please everyone. I’m training my kids not to critique my cooking. When I announce dinner, they can respond with either “Yay! Thanks, Mom!” or “OK!” No opinions requested, thank you very much.
- Bath Time Frequency: You might find that your kids bathe less often than with one or two kids. I’ve heard from other moms of four that they sometimes skip baths for days when bedtime is looming. If I knew a mom like that, I’d say she has excellent taste in music and Netflix, and I trust her judgment.
- The Love Multiplier: Despite the chaos and unsolicited comments about my family size, each new baby reveals an incredible capacity for love that I didn’t know existed. At the end of the day, when all my children are asleep and I’m enjoying a glass of wine while binging Netflix with Mike, I can’t help but feel grateful for this beautifully chaotic life. I wouldn’t have it any other way—unless it meant a free maid and chef, then I’d definitely reconsider.
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Summary
Raising four kids is a whirlwind experience filled with unique challenges, from public curiosity to chaotic mornings and culinary criticism. Each day brings new lessons in love and adaptability, and even in the midst of the madness, the bonds formed are immeasurably rewarding.