Recently, while driving with my daughter, I tuned into a local radio show where the female host referred to the new British prime minister, Emma Lane, as a “difficult” woman for her no-nonsense attitude. This label often gets attached to women who refuse to tolerate nonsense. I switched off the radio and took the opportunity to discuss the significance of being a “difficult” woman with my daughter.
I want her to be passionate and assertive; I want her to embody the essence of a girl boss—not just someone who is bossy. I take pride in her ability to stand her ground at such a young age. She’s naturally composed and doesn’t indulge in drama. However, I recognize that as she grows, she will face challenges that may make it harder for her to be in charge of her own life. It’s crucial for her to understand that she is the best person for that role. Here are seven strategies I’m using to raise a confident girl who knows how to assert herself.
1. Take Charge of Your Body
Your body is uniquely yours, and you are in control of how you share it. If you decide to say “yes” to someone’s touch but later change your mind, that’s perfectly valid—your comfort comes first. Wear what makes you feel empowered, not what others say is appropriate. Remember, you don’t have to adjust your appearance to fit someone else’s expectations.
2. Prioritize Your Needs
Speak up about what you want, but also take responsibility for your happiness. It’s easy to think that certain things or people can bring you joy, but true happiness comes from within. Understanding what ignites your passion and taking charge of your own happiness is essential. Depending on others to fulfill your needs can lead to disappointment.
3. Own Your Voice
Use your unique voice instead of trying to conform. There’s no one else like you, and that individuality is your strength. People who truly care about you will appreciate the authentic you, not a diluted version. Don’t be discouraged by those who may label you as bossy or difficult—your voice deserves to be heard.
4. Embrace Your Emotions
Acknowledge your feelings and don’t suppress them. Addressing your emotions in a healthy manner is crucial. You are the only one who can truly understand your feelings, so don’t let anyone dismiss them.
5. Control Your Actions
Mistakes are part of growth—own them and learn from them. Don’t succumb to peer pressure. Your choices reflect who you are. If something feels wrong to you, trust that instinct, regardless of what others might be doing.
6. Trust Your Instincts
Your intuition is your inner compass—always pay attention to it. It never lies and can guide you through tough decisions.
7. Share Your Opinions
You have a right to express your views. Always communicate your thoughts kindly, but remember that it’s okay to get emotional sometimes. Choose your words wisely; once spoken, you can’t take them back—make sure they matter.
I anticipate many more conversations like this as my daughter grows. I, too, grapple with the challenge of expressing my feelings and standing up for myself. If that labels me as “difficult,” or other names, so be it. I want my daughter to see me as someone who isn’t afraid to be authentic and assertive, rather than a person who never had the courage to voice her true self.
Many women who are deemed “difficult” are simply focused on getting things done and don’t concern themselves with labels. I wear that title proudly, and I hope my daughter will too.
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Summary
This article explores seven essential ways to empower young girls to become assertive and confident individuals. It emphasizes the importance of body autonomy, self-expression, emotional intelligence, and decision-making. The author shares personal insights on nurturing her daughter’s inner girl boss while championing authenticity and self-advocacy.