As a parent, I’ve come to realize that my children have become quite skilled at navigating my weaknesses. They’ve developed a sort of unspoken code that allows them to get what they want. It’s a game we play daily, and while I’m aware of their strategies, I often find myself falling into their traps. Here are seven ways they manage to successfully manipulate me:
1. At Bedtime
When they want to extend their bedtime, they know just how to get me. They switch on the TV to a home renovation show—something I can’t resist. After a few moments of me watching in awe as a rundown house is transformed, they snuggle closer and begin playing with my hair. It’s a surefire way for them to earn an extra hour of wakefulness.
2. When I Need My Caffeine Fix
My kids are well aware of my caffeine cravings. They often suggest a quick stop at a nearby fast-food joint for a cheap soda, cunningly proposing that they grab something off the Dollar Menu. Before I know it, I’m indulging in my third soda while they enjoy ice cream cones, all while I’m pinned down by my Pinterest browsing.
3. Shopping Trips to Target
During our visits to Target, they drop hints about wanting something from the Dollar Spot. Their offers to give me a foot or shoulder rub in exchange for a trinket are hard to resist. I find myself handing over cash with the hope of a good massage later, hoping I won’t regret it.
4. Post-Disobedience Compliments
After I’ve reprimanded them for their misbehavior, my kids are quick to shower me with compliments. They tell me how wonderful I look and encourage me to buy those shoes I’ve been eyeing. Somehow, this makes me feel guilty about being too strict, and I often forget that their flattery is merely a tactic to avoid consequences.
5. “I’m Scared” Claims
When they express fear—like when my oldest was anxious about riding the bus for the first time—I can’t help but want to comfort them. However, I’ve noticed that this “fear” tactic often leads to countless trips downstairs after bedtime. I’ve given in to this manipulation more times than I’d like to admit.
6. Feigning Sickness
This tactic usually surfaces during dinner, especially if they are faced with something unappetizing. I used to insist they finish their meal until one fateful dinner when my daughter got sick after being forced to eat her eggs. Now, I’m cautious about this one; it’s simply not worth the risk.
7. Dramatic Injuries
Whenever my kids declare that something hurts, I immediately rush to investigate. It usually turns out to be a minor scratch that requires a band-aid—and inevitably, they then request a popsicle as a cure. I still find myself falling for this ruse every time.
This ongoing dance between my kids and me creates a dynamic that benefits us both. I relish the sweet moments of motherhood, while they hone their skills in persuasion and negotiation. While I may not always be proud of my responses, I certainly enjoy the perks—especially when those perks involve a soothing foot rub after a long day.
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Summary
My children have mastered the art of manipulation, using various strategies to get what they want. From bedtime tactics to playful complaints about fear or illness, they navigate my weaknesses with finesse. While I’m aware of their games, I still find myself giving in, enjoying the perks of parenthood along the way.