As a parent to a delightful little girl named Ruby, I can affirm she’s an absolute joy. However, her antics often leave me questioning her sanity. If an adult were to engage in any of her bizarre behaviors, they’d surely find themselves committed. Here are some prime examples:
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Consuming Feces
Just the other day, I was playing catch with my 9-year-old son, Jake, when Ruby discovered a piece of dog poop in the yard and decided to take a bite. The most alarming part? I was more shocked than she was! After a considerable struggle, I managed to pry the offending morsel from her mouth. She erupted into tears, and there I was, soothing her with comforting words after a poop-eating incident. If I were to do something similar, I’d expect a one-way trip to the hospital. Instead, I just cleaned her up and chuckled about it later. -
Chronic Sleep Disruption
Ruby has taken it upon herself to be a no-nap crusader. She wakes up multiple times each night, screaming for reasons known only to her. The next day, she expresses her frustration through irrational crying and nonsensical babbling. If I were to behave like this in a professional setting, I’d be called out immediately. -
Fecal Artistry
Some toddlers engage in what can only be described as “poop painting.” If that’s not grounds for commitment, I don’t know what is. -
Uncontrollable Screaming
Whether she wants a drink, is unhappy with her diaper, or simply feels joyful, Ruby’s go-to communication method is screaming. This blunt approach keeps me on my toes and often leads to more confusion than clarity. I’ve thought about trying this technique in meetings or to express my opinions at home, but it would probably damage my relationships more than it helps. -
Potty Training Resistance
Despite being perfectly capable of using the toilet, Ruby shows no interest. Instead, she’s content to soil her pants and then demand someone change her. If I were caught in a public place doing that, I’d certainly be escorted out and possibly hospitalized. -
Biting Issues
Ruby has developed a habit of biting. Enough said. -
Face-Touching Quirks
My toddler has a peculiar affection for touching faces. Sometimes it’s sweet, but other times, she’s found tugging at my lips or poking my eyes. Her hands are often covered in drool or other unmentionables. If a stranger attempted this, I’d be furious, but with Ruby, it feels like an innocent gesture of love.
Overall, it’s a wild ride, and I can only hope these behaviors will fade as she grows out of her toddler phase. For more parenting insights, check out this post on fertility supplements at Make a Mom and learn more about related topics at NHS. If you have any concerns about your own experiences, consider consulting experts at Intracervical Insemination.
In summary, while parenting a toddler can be chaotic, it’s also filled with moments that are both hilarious and bewildering.