60 Witty Chemistry Puns and Jokes You’ll Want to Use Periodically

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Puns are an often overlooked form of humor, especially when they’re rooted in science. Whether you were a chemistry enthusiast back in school or currently work in the field, these clever wordplays are sure to bring a smile to your face. Kids will also get a kick out of these funny quips. Here are 25 chemistry-inspired puns, jokes, one-liners, and even some tough riddles to add a touch of fun to your day in the lab.

  1. I like to use chemistry puns, but only periodically.
  2. Atoms are not trustworthy; they make up everything.
  3. Did you know you can cool yourself down to -273.15˚C and still be 0K?
  4. Are chemical workers unionized?
  5. Gold is the best element because it’s truly AU-some.
  6. A salt made a pun, and it was Sodium funny.
  7. Keep your ion on the goal.
  8. That angry flask really overreacted.
  9. Lost an electron? You gotta keep an ion on it.
  10. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
  11. You seem upset — you need to molecule off.
  12. I can’t recall that element; it’s on the tip of my tungsten.
  13. The proton is not talking to the other proton because he’s mad atom.
  14. Chemists are always joyful in the lab since they’re in their element.
  15. Be like a proton and stay positive.
  16. It’s morning! Up and atom!
  17. Do you have 11 protons? Because you’re sodium cute.
  18. That’ll be $5 for the electrons; neutrons are free of charge.
  19. You can take all your bad chemistry puns and barium.
  20. May the mass times acceleration be with you.
  21. Think you’re a 10? On the pH scale, maybe — you’re basic.
  22. When people campaigned for Reagan, they wanted others to electron.
  23. I wanted to share a chemistry pun, but I couldn’t zinc of one.
  24. Chill out; it’s called ChemisTRY, not ChemiSUCEED.
  25. I’d share a good chemistry joke, but they all argon.

When I’m working with chemistry, I’m truly in my element. That joke was so sodium funny, I just had to slap my neon! I have a ton of chemistry jokes, but I worry I won’t get a good reaction. Remember the most important rule in chemistry: Don’t lick the spoon!

A silver element walked up to gold at a bar and said, “AU, get outta here.” What’s the chemical formula for coffee? CoFe2. And for a banana? BaNa2. Anyone got jokes about salt? Na.

A barometer enters a bar and tells the bartender, “I need a drink; I’m under a lot of pressure.” You’re too mad; go molecule off.

Good morning! Time to work, up and atom. What’s the formula for a cat in chemistry? An ion with a paw-sitive charge. I make terrible chemistry puns. Periodically.

I sulphur when you argon. When chemists pass away, they Barium. “What do you do with a dead chemist?” [Ba] I once tried to tell a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction. Argon walked into a bar, and the bartender said, “We don’t serve your kind here.” Argon didn’t react.

Did you hear about Oxygen and Magnesium? They’re dating—OMg! What about Sodium jokes? Na. Heavy elements? All I could think of was U.

Organic chemistry is tough. Everyone studying it has alkynes of trouble. Do you have any sodium hypobromite? NaBrO. Why is the world so diverse? It’s made up of alkynes of people! How can you tell when an organometallic is drunk? It’s epoxicated. Chemistry is killing me; every time I do a Diels-Alder reaction, I think I’m diene!

Why do chemists refer to helium, curium, and barium as medical elements? Because if you can’t helium or curium, you barium! Did you catch the news about the dinosaurs? They Ar-gon. My tepid flask has been underreacting lately.

What’s the most important rule in chemistry? Don’t befriend the lab mice. H2O is water, H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide, and what about H2O4? Drinking. Did you hear that oxygen went on a second date with potassium? How did it go? It went OK2!

Why do chemists love nitrates? They’re cheaper than day rates. What show do cesium and iodine enjoy watching together? CSI. And what’s the chemical formula for coffee? CoFe2.

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In summary, these clever chemistry puns and jokes are a fantastic way to add some humor to your day, whether you’re a student, a professional, or just someone who appreciates a good joke.