If you’re a mother, there’s a high probability you’ve faced the trials of sleep deprivation at some point. After soothing your little ones during the night, you rise before dawn to juggle the multiple hats you wear: caregiver, partner, worker, and homemaker. Let’s face it, surviving the day is a remarkable feat, placing you in the ranks of superhero status. Yet, in your fatigued state, you’ve likely had a few moments of forgetfulness or blunders that you’d prefer to keep under wraps. So, I’ll share these confessions on your behalf.
Here’s my list of the top 50 things that sleep-deprived moms often do:
- Consume over three cups of coffee before noon. (Face it, that barista knows your order by heart.)
- Mistakenly pour breast milk into your coffee instead of creamer.
- Use the TV as a makeshift babysitter.
- Have cold pizza for breakfast and cereal for dinner.
- Skip showers in favor of a quick swipe of deodorant.
- Toss your hair into a wet bun instead of styling it post-shower.
- Avoid being in a family photo at all costs.
- Wear the same makeup from yesterday.
- Borrow diapers and wipes from friends, neighbors, or even the lost-and-found.
- Doze off in the most unexpected places or positions.
- Discard kids’ clothes when the stains become too much to handle.
- Take extended bathroom breaks just to enjoy a moment of solitude.
- Chew gum instead of brushing your teeth.
- Drop the kids off at daycare and then nap in the car.
- Instantly connect with other weary-looking moms about your shared exhaustion.
- Get lost on familiar routes, despite having traveled them countless times.
- Treat your car like a landfill for kid-related items.
- Neglect shaving unless it’s a special occasion (or sometimes even then).
- Accidentally lock your keys or children in the vehicle.
- Keep saying you’ll walk the dog… but never do.
- Avoid checking the mailbox to escape the reality of bills.
- Forget to retrieve mail until it’s returned to sender.
- Lose track of the day of the week.
- Feel envious of those who seem well-rested.
- Gratefully welcome anyone willing to watch your children while you rest.
- Play your kids’ songs in the car even when they’re not present.
- Use your partner’s toothbrush because yours is nowhere to be found.
- Re-read the same page of a book multiple times before packing it away.
- Leave groceries in the car until your vehicle starts to smell.
- Pour a glass of wine at 4 p.m. to help you survive the evening.
- Spend the day eagerly anticipating your kids’ naps and bedtime.
- Schedule doctor appointments and then forget to attend.
- Celebrate when plans get canceled, allowing you to enjoy a quiet night in.
- Forget your grocery list and leave the store empty-handed.
- Rely on online shopping—thank you, Amazon Prime, from all exhausted moms!
- Tell yourself, “One day I’ll sleep again” or “Tomorrow I’ll be productive.”
- Change your hair color to something low-maintenance.
- Forget if you’ve fed your pets, resulting in double feedings.
- Question whether you closed the garage or turned off appliances, prompting a return trip.
- Live in yoga pants, sometimes wearing them inside out.
- Confuse lotion or soap with toothpaste.
- Allow laundry to sit in the washer until it needs to be rewashed.
- Bump into furniture regularly, leaving you with unexplained bruises.
- Have emotional breakdowns in public, whether it’s at the pediatrician or in front of neighbors.
- Experience minor accidents like crashing into the garage door.
- Purchase disposable plates and cups to avoid doing dishes.
- Laugh inappropriately at things that aren’t funny, questioning your sanity.
- Buy ingredients for a meal that never gets made, leaving them to spoil.
- Wish for just one day that your partner could take a turn at breastfeeding.
- Nostalgically think back to when you had your life together, wondering if those days will return.
If any of these resonate with you, welcome to the club of sleep-deprived moms! Membership is complimentary and likely to last for the next 18 years. For more insights into motherhood, including resources like this artificial insemination kit or expert advice on topics like rheumatoid arthritis and pregnancy from this informative article, be sure to explore further. Also, for detailed information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this resource.
In summary, being a mom is an exhausting yet rewarding journey filled with humorous and relatable moments that many can identify with.