When a child suffers an injury, parents naturally expect support and empathy from the adults around them. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. This was the reality for Lisa Thompson when she took her 4-year-old son to the emergency room for stitches after he was struck in the face by a peer at school.
During their visit to Riverside Children’s Hospital, a staff member commented on the incident, suggesting to the young boy, “He must have a crush on you.” Lisa was understandably upset by this remark. She took to her personal Facebook page to express her frustration, highlighting the problematic message it sends: that someone who expresses affection might also hurt you. This narrative can confuse children and normalize unhealthy behaviors, and Lisa urged adults to recognize the impact of their words.
Since her post went live, it has been shared nearly 25,000 times and sparked a wave of supportive responses from fellow parents. Many echoed her sentiments, recalling their own experiences of being told similar justifications for bullying behavior as children.
As a child, I often heard adults dismiss teasing from boys as a sign of affection or interest. This misleading notion can lead children to believe they should be thankful for negative attention, despite the hurt it may cause. Such comments shift the focus away from holding the aggressor accountable, perpetuating the idea that boys’ aggressive actions are excusable and that girls should accept such treatment.
In fact, research from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reveals that one in five tweens aged 11-14 have experienced dating violence, with many also witnessing verbal abuse in relationships. These experiences correlate with a range of negative outcomes, including higher instances of substance abuse and mental health struggles in adulthood.
October is recognized as National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, reminding us of the importance of being mindful about the messages we communicate to the younger generation. It is crucial to teach children that violence is never a demonstration of love or admiration; instead, we must emphasize respect and accountability. For more insights on fostering healthy relationships, consider exploring resources like CDC’s Pregnancy Resources.
In conclusion, let’s commit to encouraging children to recognize and reject harmful behaviors disguised as affection. Together, we can contribute to a culture that does not condone bullying or violence in any form. For additional parenting resources, check out this blog post about the home insemination kit and other helpful topics. If you’re interested in a more mindful approach to parenting, Mindful Monday: Spooky Vibes for Halloween provides valuable insights.