Let’s be real: when your period hits, laughing might not be the first thing on your mind. The discomfort and mood swings can certainly take the joy out of life. However, as the saying goes, laughter is the best medicine! So here are some cheeky and amusing period-related jokes to help lighten the mood—even if it’s just a little.
These gems might not replace the comfort of a heating pad or a tub of your favorite ice cream, but they can certainly provide a welcome distraction while you navigate through that monthly struggle. And if you’re feeling a bit more than just cramping, check out our jokes about breasts for another round of light-hearted fun.
Funny Period Jokes for Some Much-Needed Laughs
- Did you hear about the rapper who only performed during her period? They said she had a killer flow.
- Period: Guess who’s back…
Me: Seriously, can we not do this today?
Period: I can come back in 9 months?
Me: Please stop singing! - This whole period thing is really putting a damper on my swag.
- What kind of bikes do women ride? Menstrual cycles!
- Girl: Hey, Mother Nature! Long time no see.
Mother Nature: UTERUS PUNCH! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there? Tampon.
Tampon who? You know who I am! - Periods teach you how to get blood out of fabric… which may explain why you hear more stories about men getting caught for murder.
- A woman walks into a pharmacy to buy tampons. She sees a sign for five boxes for just a dollar. Thinking it’s a mistake, she asks a clerk. The clerk replies, “Nope, it’s right! This week only, no strings attached!”
- In American Sign Language, the sign for having your period is basically punching yourself in the face. Accurate, right?
- People with irregular periods really know how to go with the flow.
- What’s an ovary’s favorite TV show? Period dramas!
- Period: WAKE UP, YOU’VE GOT CRAMPS!
- Period: How about an entire chocolate cake for breakfast?
- Period: Got big plans? Too bad. You’re sleeping in.
- Period: Let’s say you eat a cookie as big as a house for dinner.
- Period: What about some ibuprofen?
- Period: Got things to do? Sleep first!
- Period: How’s that back pain? Feeling better?
- Uterus: I didn’t bleed yesterday—wear those cute panties!
- A woman’s period is like her body accidentally hitting caps lock on her emotions once a month.
- Periods are inconsistent; sometimes it’s a gentle stream, other times it’s a full-on tsunami!
- Those who exercise to alleviate cramps are the true survivors of the apocalypse.
- My favorite mythical creatures? The happy girls in tampon commercials.
- Getting your period is like being attacked by a dementor—only chocolate can save you!
- Uterus: Oh, you have a busy day planned?
Me: Please don’t!
Uterus: Wouldn’t it be a shame if something were to… happen? - Me: *prepping for a busy day with pads/tampons ready*
Period: LET’S GET READY TO RUUUMBLE! - Uterus: Your period is over now.
Uterus: JK, here’s some brown sludge! - Woman: I’m having the worst period ever.
Husband: Are you sure you’re not ovary-acting? - Tampon boxes should include prizes. Yes, your period sucks, but how about a discount on ice cream?
- When I’m on my period:
Person: Hey.
Me: Can you be quiet? - Throw a tampon into a group of boys and watch them freak out like it’s a scene from Monsters Inc.
- Heard about the documentary on period jokes? The audience gave it a standing ovulation!
- I once panicked thinking my period lasted 23 days… then I checked my calendar—it had only been 3 hours!
- Me 80% of the time: *stone-faced, emotionless*
Me on my period: “Why am I crying?” “I DON’T KNOW!” - After an hour of excruciating cramps: “I think I can handle this level of pain.”
Uterus: “How about this?” *pain cranked up by a million* - When you have cramps before your period starts, it’s like your uterus is humming the Jaws theme.
- Getting out of the shower on your period is a race against time and gravity.
- What’s something you hate doing on your period? Coughing, sneezing, laughing—just existing!
- Why can’t periods just last an hour? You made your point—I’m not pregnant, so leave!
Feeling overwhelmed by your cycle? If you’re curious about home insemination options, be sure to check out our blog post on the at-home insemination kit. And for those concerned about health during pregnancy, this resource on preventing infections is invaluable. Also, for anyone interested in more information about pregnancy and home insemination, visit this excellent resource.
In summary, laughter can be a great escape from the trials of your period. These jokes serve as a reminder that while menstruation can be challenging, humor can ease the discomfort.