I vowed I would never mirror my mother’s ways when I became a parent. No way. I envisioned being the laid-back mom who practiced yoga with her children and never raised her voice. I imagined spontaneous fun outings, where the living room walls would be adorned with washable crayon masterpieces, all while soothing French language tapes played softly in the background.
And then I had kids.
Now my walls tell a different story, splattered with Crayola marks that, despite their “washable” label, have proven to be quite permanent. Those language tapes captivated my kids for all of seven minutes before they clamored for “Curious George.” My spontaneous adventures have turned into urgent runs to the Starbucks drive-thru… or the liquor store.
I was convinced I was still the cool mom until one day, I pretended to have a headache just to get some peace and quiet. If that trick works on my husband, it should surely garner sympathy from the little ones. But then it hit me—why did this feel so familiar? Oh no, I am becoming my mother!
Before you panic, take a moment to reflect and see if you recognize any of these 24 signs indicating you might be following in your mother’s footsteps:
- No child leaves your home without enduring the “mom check”: sniffing for odd odors, inspecting hands and faces for dirt, and firing off a barrage of questions about their need to pee, poop, or snack.
- You frequently complain about being bloated, suffering from backaches, craving coffee, or feeling exhausted.
- Your wardrobe consists of mom jeans, yoga pants, or sweatpants—all the comfortable essentials.
- Before heading out, you mutter cryptic phrases like, “I have to put my face on,” as you hurriedly apply mascara.
- You’ve been caught using the reflection in the toaster to tweeze an unruly chin hair.
- You find yourself mumbling under your breath so often that your voice has become the background noise of your life.
- Your lectures often begin with, “When I was your age…”
- You’ve been seen wearing a coat over your pajamas during morning drop-offs, much to your kids’ embarrassment.
- You belt out songs in the car, passionately reminiscing about the music of the ’80s.
- You’ve perfected the art of the “never-ending goodbye,” starting new conversations in the middle of saying farewell.
- Everyone knows when you’ve indulged in ice cream, thanks to the middle-aged lactose intolerance that has set in.
- When your children’s clothes lean towards rips and graphics, you suddenly become the fashion police, enforcing conservative choices.
- You catch yourself saying, “1, 2…OMG! Don’t make me say 3!”
- You’ve mastered your mother’s disapproving glare, and it works on neighborhood kids just as effectively as your own.
- Surprisingly, the PTA has become an exciting place for you. (Wait, did you just say that?)
- After years of parenting, you finally understand that the mug your mom carried to every event wasn’t always filled with coffee.
- You find yourself creatively lying to your children about food, reasons for not doing things, and why they must comply—so much so that you start to believe spaghetti is indeed hair from a giant evil ninja.
- You can’t resist sharing embarrassing stories about your kids, like the time your son mooned the brownie troop or how adorable his tushie is.
- It appears that moms are quite free with their bodily functions, especially after ice cream (see #11).
- The phrase “because I gave birth to you” has become your go-to excuse.
- Your kids cringe at your workout attire and the fact that you do Pilates at home with Jane Fonda DVDs.
- You’ve jokingly told your daughter that you hope she has kids just like her. That’ll teach her!
- You find you need a half a pot of coffee to function in the morning and half a bottle of wine by the evening.
- You’ve developed strong opinions on Spanx, diets, and the acceptable duration for wearing maternity pants after having your last child.
Admit it, the moment you sneak an extra slice of cake and start muttering about dieting tomorrow, it will dawn on you—you’re transforming into your mother.
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Summary:
In this light-hearted article, we explore the humorous yet relatable signs that you might be becoming your mother as you navigate parenthood. From wardrobe choices to parenting tactics, each sign reflects the inevitable transformation many parents experience.