When it comes to exercising, people generally fall into one of four categories:
- They absolutely love it.
- They’re not fans, but they do it anyway because they recognize its benefits.
- They despise it and come up with countless excuses to avoid it.
- They loathe it, skip it entirely, and don’t feel a shred of guilt about their decision.
I often wish I belonged to category one or two. Heck, sometimes I even envy those in category four who seem blissfully indifferent. But alas, I do care—just a smidge. So here I am, stuck in category three, filled with fleeting intentions to work out.
I dream about exercising. I gaze at the collection of workout DVDs on my shelf, showcasing impeccably fit individuals with perfect bodies, and think, “I want to look like that!” Yet moments later, I find myself munching on a donut.
If you’re in the same boat and need a fresh batch of excuses for why you haven’t hit the gym, look no further. Here are 15 justifications for your workout hiatus:
- Gym equipment looks intimidating. Honestly, those machines remind me of the medieval torture devices from movies. All those buttons, weights, and levers? I can’t be the only one who finds them ominous.
- My workout clothes are nonexistent. Since having two kids in under a year, my body has shifted in ways I never anticipated. What once fit no longer does, and the thought of shopping for new activewear with toddlers in tow is daunting. (Though the gym is conveniently close to Target, I guess!)
- Exhaustion is my constant companion. Kids have an uncanny ability to drain all energy reserves. By the end of the day, I can barely muster the strength to lift a fork filled with cake, let alone do lunges or squats.
- I can’t wake up any earlier. My baby monitor serves as my alarm, blaring before dawn. After countless nighttime interruptions—from teething to bad dreams—I refuse to wake up even earlier.
- A new workout DVD I ordered mistakenly went to an old address. I’d like to think it’s a cosmic sign that my attempts at jazzercise and I are simply not meant to be.
- After working out at home, I resemble a cartoon character. Seriously, I look like a bizarre fusion of a frazzled celebrity and a plush toy. Going out in public post-exercise? Not happening.
- My belly jiggles during jumping jacks, and it’s hard not to giggle. Between catching my breath and laughing, it’s practically impossible to focus on exercising.
- My kids turned my deodorant into an art project. It’s a thoughtful gesture, but now I’m left with body odor and dirty windows to clean.
- Showering is a rarity, even on days when I’m not exercising. The thought of maintaining personal hygiene seems like a monumental task (refer to the deodorant incident).
- I just ate. I heard somewhere that working out right after a meal can lead to catastrophe, so I’ll just wait.
- I need to fuel up first, but then I’ll be too full to exercise. And then, of course, there’s the kitchen to clean. It’s a slippery slope.
- My hair is constantly in my face. I thought a new haircut could help, but I ended up lost in a Pinterest rabbit hole for hours.
- I suspect I’m coming down with something and need to conserve my energy. Better safe than sorry, right?
- I just recovered from being sick and don’t want to overdo it.
- I actually made it to the gym, but there were no parking spots! I did find some at Target across the street, though, which led to an impromptu shopping spree for new workout clothes. So, not all was lost.
For those navigating the complexities of parenthood, sometimes a little humor and creativity in our excuses can be just what we need. And if you’re curious about at-home options for conception, you might want to check out this excellent resource. Also, for more information on caring for mothers, visit this page. If you’re looking for a comprehensive guide on fertility, this site is an excellent place to start.
Summary
In the world of fitness, many parents find themselves making excuses for not working out. From the intimidating gym equipment to the exhaustion of parenting, there are plenty of justifications that keep individuals from breaking a sweat. Yet, with a little humor and creativity, we can navigate our fitness journeys, even if it takes a few detours along the way.