By: Jamie Thompson
Updated: Aug. 21, 2023
Originally Published: Sep. 17, 2014
As a parent, I often find myself telling my kids things that aren’t exactly true. Their young minds are impressionable, and they hang onto my every word simply because I’m their mom. I adore this age, and part of me wishes time would just freeze right now. Here are twelve fibs I share with my kids that they genuinely believe:
- “I won’t repeat myself!” Let’s be honest: this isn’t true. I think saying this somehow adds weight to my words, but it’s really not a credible threat. Yet, I find myself saying it constantly. Duh!
- “Alright, we’re off to the doctor because there’s clearly an issue with your hearing.” This one seems to work like a charm. Eventually, they’ll admit they heard me all along but chose to ignore my requests. Gotcha!
- “If you keep chewing on your hair, you’re going to sprout a hair tree in your tummy.” Sometimes, it gets a reaction, though I felt a twinge of guilt when my daughter complained about stomach pains, saying, “Mom, I think my hair tree might be growing!”
- “That’s it! Our Cape Cod trip is canceled!” Sure, I’d actually cancel a long-planned trip just because they refuse to wear pants.
- “I’m calling a babysitter, and you can stay home while the rest of us go out.” As if I have babysitters on speed dial ready to swoop in on a moment’s notice.
- “Fine! Don’t eat your dinner. Starve if you want.” Sometimes this reverse psychology works, although by dinner time, I’m often too exhausted to care.
- “Cut down on the paper towel use, or the paper towel police will be here soon.” This one backfired when my child challenged me, asking, “Mom, is there really a paper towel police?” Busted!
- “What a fantastic drawing!” In truth, it’s not great at all. I could do better, and I’m not even an artist.
- “Oh no, it looks like McDonald’s is closed today.” This lie gets me off the hook every time and avoids a showdown. Win-win!
- “Fine, don’t go to school.” This reverse psychology seems effective. I wonder how long the twins will remain so eager to learn.
- “Oh no! I completely forgot my wallet.” This one started as an excuse to dodge the ice cream truck. Why do those things always show up at the park?
- “You can play on the iPad for just 15 minutes.” But honestly, I can get so much done while they’re occupied. An hour later, I’m still tackling my to-do list while they’re happily engaged with educational games.
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In summary, the little lies we tell our children can sometimes help us navigate the daily challenges of parenting. While they may not be the most honest, they sure do make life a bit easier.