As large families become increasingly visible in public spaces, the unsolicited comments and questions that accompany them can be overwhelming. Honestly, I sometimes feel like I might snap and use a watermelon as a projectile in the grocery store. To help maintain my composure, here are ten questions that should definitely be avoided when interacting with families of many members.
- “Are you trying to put on a show?”
We’re not a circus act. If we were, I’d be making a lot more money than I am now. So, counting our family members aloud isn’t impressive; it’s just awkward. Yes, we have five children, and thanks for noticing without needing to take off your shoes. - “Are you competing with the Duggars?”
Oh, how original! I’ve never heard that one before. In reality, I’m just trying to create my own little army, and cloning is way too complicated. - “You really should learn to say no!”
Excuse me? Have you seen my partner? Why would I say no to them? It’s amusing to think that my choices stem from a lack of self-control, when it could just as easily be the opposite. - “Don’t you know what causes this?”
Yes, we are fully aware. And let me assure you, we’ve mastered that aspect quite well. - “Were all your kids planned?”
Did you plan to be rude? This question is puzzling; my reproductive decisions are nobody’s business but my partner’s and mine. Whether the answer is yes or no, I’m bound to be judged. - “Are you religious?”
The assumption that large families are solely the result of religious fervor is frustrating. Many folks simply enjoy parenting and desire a big family, regardless of their beliefs or lack thereof. - “Why did you keep them all?”
They’re not stray animals! One time, I jokingly replied, “Well, we did eat a few…” - “How do you afford all these kids?”
They take turns eating. Seriously, we’re all about the budget-friendly solutions—like using crates for beds instead of spending on fancy furniture. - “I could never handle that many kids!”
Good! Please don’t. - “You’re done, right?”
Are you planning to fund their college education? If not, it’s none of your concern.
The one question that truly gets under my skin is, “You poor woman!” Yes, my life can be chaotic and loud, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I love my family and wouldn’t change a thing. Large families may not be for everyone, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t wonderful for some.
For those navigating similar situations, you might find helpful advice on fertility boosters, and for more expert information on conception, check out this resource. If you’re interested in exploring options like IVF, this article is an excellent place to start.
Summary:
This article highlights ten questions that are inappropriate to ask large families, emphasizing respect for their choices and experiences. It encourages a more understanding approach to interacting with families of various sizes.